They've tried almost everything: containment domes, golf balls, human hair, lulling the oil spill to sleep with Barry Manilow music.
Nothing has worked. As of this morning, the Gulf oil spill had spread to Florida and Texas -- and was trying to join Facebook.
Now, British Petroleum has devised a new plan: divert the big slick into the Bermuda Triangle.
"The Devil's Triangle has an excellent track record of making things disappear," said BP boss Tony Wayward. "Airplanes, ships, the continent of Atlantis. I don't know why we didn't think of this sooner."
This story originally appeared at NotTheLATimes.com. Copyright 2010 by Roy Rivenburg.