Sabrina Dominguez is a brain cancer patient at MD Anderson Proton Therapy Center.
I ruined my mother's life. She had me right after high school. She had dreams that I interrupted and although I blame myself, my mother doesn't. I never got to thank her so, Mommy, thank you.
She didn't spend a lot of time with me when I was a baby and although I bring it up a lot, Mommy, I don't judge you. You moved me away and we went to a bad home but it's okay Mommy, I forgive you. You added a sibling to our little family and although he's a pain, Mommy, thank you. I know bad things unraveled and words were spat but Mommy, I still love you. I got McDonalds in my red sweater and you blessed me with a little sister. Mommy, thank you.
It was hard with Laila in that two-bedroom apartment but it was shelter and you always gave us what we needed, Mommy, thank you. Do you remember that one time when I wouldn't clean my room and I kicked, screamed and cried and you still made me clean it? Mommy, thank you. When we moved next door to grandpa's and I ran away to his house, you went over there and made me go home. Mommy, thank you.
When you fell so far in love we moved to the west side and you made me leave my friends, I know I was ungrateful then but, Mommy, thank you. When I got a boyfriend in the sixth grade and you took away my phone after you saw "together forever" messages, Mommy, thank you. When I called you a bad word and you didn't slap my face, Mommy, thank you. When I played basketball and you sat and cheered at every game, Mommy, thank you. When you married Freddy and gave me the best stepdad I could ask for, Mommy, thank you. When I would get low grades and you would ground me, Mommy, thank you. When I got into Silva Health Magnet all you did was support me, Mommy, thank you. When Mrs. Johnson called you and you grounded me for a month, Mommy, thank you. When the headaches started and you thought I was just a pill popper, Mommy, thank you. You bought me time. When the doctor called you and you risked your life driving to grandpa's, Mommy, thank you. When we were in the hospital, and you let my friends instead of family be in the room, Mommy, thank you. When we got in that plane to go to Houston I know you were scared, Mommy, thank you.
When I cried the very first time back in Houston, all you did was hold me, Mommy, thank you. When you told me not to be scared, and we both had misty eyes before surgery, Mommy, thank you.
That first radiation treatment you painted your nails pink and purple to make me smile, Mommy, thank you. When I had a panic attack right before treatment, and you yelled at me to get it together, Mommy, thank you. When my hair fell out and I screamed in the shower you let me scream, Mommy, thank you. When you shaved your head with the clippers straight down the middle, Mommy, thank you. When you brought me back to El Paso because I couldn't take being away from my family and friends any longer, Mommy, thank you. When you held the throw-up bucket and didn't flinch my very first chemo treatment, Mommy, thank you. When I didn't come out of the hospital until Sunday and you stayed with me, I know it was hard, Mommy, thank you.
When you took me to celebrate New Year's with our family you didn't let me feel uncomfortable for being bald when the little kids started staring, Mommy, thank you. When the one person we thought would always be there left me, you reminded me that I wasn't at fault, Mommy, thank you.
When we go to parties and you automatically assume Ana is coming, Mommy, thank you. When I had a breakdown in the hospital and screamed I didn't want to do this anymore and you calmed me down, Mommy, thank you. When I yelled at you and had a third breakdown and you called Auntie Vanessa, Mommy, thank you. After that breakdown we went to the clinic and you asked for an anti-depressant, and you had them explain why they were giving that to me, Mommy, thank you. When I wanted to go to Dallas you let me go and you knew you'd miss me, Mommy, thank you. When you let me go to Tucson just for In-N-Out Burger, and you teased me, Mommy, thank you. When I shaved my head because my hair was falling out again you didn't stop to ask me why, Mommy, thank you. When I asked to go to Ruidoso with low counts just so I can have fun before going in for my next treatment, you didn't stop me, Mommy, thank you. I don't know what I'd do without you.
My mother has handled me screaming and crying in diapers, screaming and crying as a crazy kid, screaming and crying as a moody teenager, screaming and crying through cancer. She has stuck with me through it all. Through a tonsillectomy all the way to brain surgery, my mother deserves some recognition. She's my spine, my birthday shadow, my BFF, my thunder buddy, so Mommy, thank you.
Follow Sabrina Dominguez on Twitter: www.twitter.com/FlawlesslyBrina