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Sam Fulwood

Sam Fulwood

Posted: December 1, 2009 04:27 PM

Why Are Some Black Folks So Upset Over Gays Getting Married?

What's Your Reaction?

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As a church-attending Christian and a straight, married black man who lives in Washington, D.C., I have absolutely no qualms about extending full marriage rights to gay couples. I will cheer when it happens in my city.

I struggle to comprehend why folks who share my slice of the demographic pie seem to take is personally when two men or two women want to marry and live as a couple. I mean, it's not like they're taking something away from any a straight couple.

Here, in Washington, the city council is expected to pass legislation that will legalize marriage for same-sex couples. The bill seems assured of passage because 10 of the 13 city council members have signed on as supporters, and Mayor Adrian Fenty has promised to sign it into law if it passes. And, from all I've been able to learn, congressional opposition will be tepid as the 30-day review period ticks down.

Under the proposed legislation, the district would end the existing domestic partnership law and expand all rights and responsibilities associated with marriage to cover same-sex couples. Another provision of the bill wipes away gender-specific language from the city code, assuring that married gay and lesbian couples are guaranteed to be treated the same under city law as married heterosexuals.

Yet, the road to marriage equality for gays and lesbians remains twisted by opposition from--of all places--black church leaders. Notably, Bishop Harry Jackson of the suburban Maryland Hope Christian Church has been the most outspoken and visible black minister leading the fight against spreading civil rights to all corners of the nation's capital.

Jackson argues that allowing gays and lesbians to marry will - somehow, inexplicable to me - cause damage to straight people's marital bliss. He argues that the divorce rate in the District is already high and allowing gay couples to marry will add to the soaring numbers of divorces. That, of course, makes absolutely no sense.

But the opportunity to build a godly empire by preaching against homosexuality has proven irresistible and potentially profitable. Jackson's High Impact Leadership Coalition, the antigay rights group, moves in far-right circles of the Republican Party. It's a façade for a misguided holy crusade and supported by white evangelicals who have little else in common with black, working-class people in Washington.

Bishop Jackson isn't alone among backward-thinking religious leaders, either. The Catholic Archdiocese of Washington threatened to end social services in Washington if the proposed same-sex marriage legislation becomes law.

For sure, some very religious people fall on their swords of faith to justify treating gays and lesbians in a discriminatory manner. Marriage, they say, can only be godly if its benefits and obligations are reserved only for a man and a woman.

The wise thing about the D.C. bill is that it doesn't force a church or minister to perform a marriage if it conflicts with their theology. But it allows for those open-minded people of faith to do so. The legislation is civil, not aimed at changing anything that happens inside the practice of faith. Nor would the law grant gay or lesbian couples any special rights--only protect the exercise of the same rights enjoyed by other citizens. In fact, it may prove to be a fiscal blessing to the city.

What's so wrong about all that?

On the racial tip, it seems that the folks who ought to be first in line on this matter of civil right protections should be black ministers. It's not like black gays and lesbians aren't fixtures in black churches across the city. And they're not deeply closeted, either. Everyone knows what these black religious leaders seem so intent on keeping secret: Homosexuality exists among black people.

Less than half a century ago, the black clergy was on the side of unpopular rights and societal progress. If not for the courage and outspokenness of black preachers from southern pulpits, speaking of love and fairness for all of God's children, racist white theologians might have continued unchallenged to use biblical scriptures to justify unfair treatment of black Americans.

A civil right for one is a civil rights for all. As Georgia Congressman John Lewis has said on many occasions, "I have fought too hard and too long against discrimination based on race and color not to stand up against discrimination based on sexual orientation."

In a disappointingly similar situation, black churches across Washington and the nation were slow to respond to the AIDS epidemic almost a generation ago, fearing any pulpit talk would lead to airing the congregation's dirty laundry. Meanwhile, as pastors preached and choirs sang, church folks got sick and died. Only after enlightened black religious leaders opened their eyes and stopped condemning were they able to create ministries that helped--not hurt--the people in need.

So pray tell me, how is this any different?

Some - indeed, many progressive black ministers - agree that biblical pronouncements of grace should trump mean-spirited, hell-fire denunciations of gays and lesbians.

As the Rev. Dennis Wiley of Covenant Baptist Church in Washington, D.C. and the co-chairman of the DC Clergy United for Marriage Equality, preaches: "My support of full marriage equality for the District of Columbia is rooted not only in my passion for social justice, but also for morality and moral truth. I believe that the gospel of Jesus Christ is the gospel of love, not hate."

That's the pew where I sit and belong. My faith is strong and my love of humanity is sacrosanct. That's why I completely fail to comprehend how the exchange of vows between a loving couple--be it a man and a woman or two men or two women--changes anything of importance in my life.

No, all it does is move the city I live in one step closer to being fairer to all of its citizens.


Cross-posted from Race-Talk.

 
 
 
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
David Kaufman
12:27 PM on 12/02/2009
It's great to see a Black man of God speak out in support of the LGBT community -- this is a welcome and necessary action.

It's sad, however, that Mr. Fulwood has resorted to the same compare-and-contrast tactics as the White folks typically at the forefront of this debate.

The Civil Rights Movement was the Civil Rights Movement.

Apartheid was Apartheid.

Marriage Equality IS Marriage Equality.

All have spiritual and historical linkages -- but this need to constantly co-opt is simply inaccurate, divisive and, worst of all, lazy!

The LGBT movement has 40 glorious post-Stonewall years -- and decades if not centuries prior -- to draw upon for its own liberation struggle ideology.

It might be time to start embracing it.
02:16 PM on 12/02/2009
I completely agree. While I think that there are similar struggles, linking Marriage Equality to other movements generalizes the efforts which have taken on their own, unique life and fight.
06:34 PM on 12/02/2009
Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!
11:21 AM on 12/02/2009
Thank you for this article. I agree completely and used the Love argument talking with my husband.
He was against gay people because they are just different from him - (probably homophobic).

But, I told him why I think it's wrong for hospitals to not let loved ones visit in the hospital, if it's to see someone they love. He didn't make the connection at first and hadn't realized that if you're not a spouse or a child, they won't let you in to visit, like in the intensive care unit.

Things like this are why it's a civil issue, a right for everyone. If they love each other, they should be able to get married, and enjoy the societal benefits of being married.

And, remember, it's not a sin if it doesn't hurt yourself or anyone else.
09:45 AM on 12/02/2009
Religion not race is the only factor that stands in opposition to same sex marriages. And even though on this issue you stand against this intolerance, you still remain part of the problem. You remain part of the problem because you legitimize the religion itself and provide cover for those who stand against gay marriage. As do all the liberal Christians. You protect the foundation of the intolerant, the Bible, and as such shield it from the much needed criticism it deserves.

You can talk all day about your interpretation that the Bible is about love, because for every person who interprets it that way there are others on the opposite side of this debate (with just as much biblical knowledge) that disagree.

Their is nothing noble about faith.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
standforpeace
10:24 PM on 12/02/2009
So I'm guessing you believe that every American who disagrees with the continued wars in Afghanistan or Iraq should leave the country because remaining an American gives legitimacy to those policies? The blogger has already stated that he belongs to a church that does not condone discrimination against gays and lesbians. He himself is standing up and laying out his rejection of that discrimination. How does his giving up his religion help the cause of gays and lesbians?

Furthermore, some of the most important scriptures in the New Testament can and have been interpreted in ways that lift up those who are otherwise scorned. For example, the call to love our neighbors as ourselves and to remember the good Samaritan who Jesus labeled as "good" precisely because he was kind to someone who was not of his group. Or how about "judge not lest you be judged?" There are many Christians whose openness and acceptance of others is rooted in their reading of the very Bible that you would have them toss aside.
01:42 AM on 12/03/2009
"There are many Christians whose openness and acceptance of others is rooted in their reading of the very Bible that you would have them toss aside."

I maintain my position that there is nothing noble about this statement, be good to others simply out of either fear of eternal damnation or hope for eternal reward is morally bankrupt. Let me also point out that this argument of good verses in the New Testament and good deeds by Christians adds nothing to this argument for many reasons. You can find similar teachings in almost all religions including many that existed long before Christianity, and on top of that because you choose to isolate the good verses says nothing of the overall interpretation of the Bible or its actual truth or merit. And you also can not prove that people who claim that their "openness and acceptance of others is rooted in their reading of Bible" would not exhibit the same behavior if the Bible was never taught to them. Basically I believe in the goodness of people on their own merits, whereas you are saying people are good only because of the Bible. Because I say yes toss aside the Bible and take ownership of your own goodness, because they deserve the credit.
01:42 AM on 12/03/2009
(cont'd)

The blogger stands for a religion that for the most part stands against homosexuals, he does this in spite of his own personal feelings to the contrary. So even if he wants to join the fight against the religious intolerance that is preventing marriage equality, that still does not absolve him from the role he plays in providing cover for those religious people who are intolerant.
01:30 PM on 12/08/2009
Actually Religion and Faith are not the things driving the hatred and bigotry - it is bigotted leaders of the faithful, interpreting their beliefs to fit their own fears and hatreds who demand inequality and persecution.

Personally I think they're really afriad that gay couples will show a lower divorce rate than their church going straight brethren and make them all look bad.
08:56 AM on 12/02/2009
And when have Protestant churches cared about civil marriages?
The various religious groups can still ignore civil marriages if they choose. Who cares?
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Weirdo
"It's a Wall Street government"
10:14 PM on 12/01/2009
I heard that not only black, religious fundamentalists are against gay marriage, but also the wider black culture. There is, I was told, a sort of resentment of gays' equation of the struggle for gay rights with the struggle for black civil rights, in the AF community.

Is this true?
10:18 PM on 12/01/2009
For many, not for all.
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Weirdo
"It's a Wall Street government"
10:31 PM on 12/01/2009
Why? What's going on there?
10:24 PM on 12/01/2009
No more or less than in the larger white communities.
10:11 PM on 12/01/2009
Race has absolutely nothing to do with homophobia. The majority of people who consider themselves personally conservative AND religious are against gay marriage (and gay rights in general) regardless of their race, skin color or nationality. The pro gay marriage movement needs to page out of the book of the anti gay marriage movement and get organized and focused. Stop focusing on the race of the voters because it only causes scapegoating when you lose and start taking your message everywhere including churches. If you want to change hearts and minds you have to meet people where they are and you have to take your fight to the court system. Also you have to stop fighting against the reality that a lot of people do not equate racial and gender discrimination with discrimination based on sexuality. If it were that simple gay marriage would be legal in all 50 states.
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09:22 PM on 12/01/2009
"The wise thing about the D.C. bill is that it doesn't force a church or minister to perform a marriage if it conflicts with their theology."

No marriage law, anywhere, does such a thing - not gay marriage and not straight marriage. All churches have total discretion to determine whom they're willing to provide a church wedding for. Total, that is, except for the churches which want to perform marriages for thier gay members. They're not allowed to do so in most of the US.
09:05 AM on 12/02/2009
The problem is that some religious groups think that their religon gives itself the sole rights to determine what a "marriage" is and who has the right to marry, and then tries to claim that their belief should be the same as the civil law, like Europe in the Dark Ages and Afganistan under the Taliban.

But our Constitution doesn't allow that, and this should have become a non-issue decades ago, but for the spinlessness of politicians.
09:03 PM on 12/01/2009
Black culture generally, black churches in particular, are deeply homophobic. And not just in the US. Look at Uganda: trying to pass a law making homosexuality a capital crime. How about Jamaica? Extremely homophobic. Common denominator: religion.
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HUFFPOST PUNDIT
Gidster
Not so much Liberal as I am anti evil.
10:05 PM on 12/01/2009
Agreed!

When you remove the religion, the argument against dissipates like smoke.
09:03 PM on 12/01/2009
I still don't understand why it's OK for liberals to bring their faith to bear in the public eye, but when Republicans do it, y'all start complaining about separating church and state.
09:09 PM on 12/01/2009
Because you cons are ALWAYS trying to force your religious nonsense down evryone's throats. When the Left talks about their faith, it's in defense of humanity, not attacking and dividing like you righties ALWAYS use it for.
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Weirdo
"It's a Wall Street government"
10:23 PM on 12/01/2009
Thank you.

He, like all of them, is incapable of seeing the difference between policy supported by both religious and secular reasons, and policy that is motivated largely or solely by the desire to enforce the outcomes of accepted religious dogma.
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HUFFPOST PUNDIT
Gidster
Not so much Liberal as I am anti evil.
10:31 PM on 12/01/2009
Because Conservatives feel that their brand of religion is superior to anyone else's, and therefore MUST hold sway, and will attempt to legislate that particular ideology to apply to everyone.

That is the big difference.
07:52 PM on 12/01/2009
Considering the horrible treatment they have endured over the centuries in both North America and Europe and elsewhere, it seems odd to me that the black community largely opposes another minority's civil rights issue. Religious blindness is surely a major factor, but is it the only one? There's a horrible instinct in most humans to find community by denouncing that which is "other." Though the fight against racism isn't over, the tide has certainly turned in favour of racial equality and harmony, I have to wonder: is there an irrational, unconscious fear among some that they might lose their hard-fought civil liberties by championing another's?
FACINGREALIT
The Truth May Hurt But It Is Still The Truth
08:13 PM on 12/01/2009
You have GOT TO BE KIDDING! This is not SEEN AS A CIVIL RIGHTS ISSUE - and your inability to ACCEPT someone elses BELIEF will forever be the ISSUE! You don't believe in being with the opposite sex but you want someone else to believe that same sex is OK - how indifferent can you be! As long as you want to deny a belief for a belief you LOSE!

Example: If you were asked to VOTE that it is ILLEGAL to be in a same sex relationship (not marriage) what would you vote and how is YOUR CHOICE - ANY DIFFERENT than asking someone who doesn't believe in same sex marriage it to vote for it. And what makes your belief better than someone elses?
08:36 PM on 12/01/2009
What you're talking about is a false equivalency. Marriage IS a civil right, NOT a "belief". Gay people aren't the ones putting our civil rights to the vote, straight people are doing that. We aren't asking people to believe in gay sex, which would be the equivalency you're making, we're demanding our full citizenship. Beliefs don't have anything to do with civil rights. You seem to think that all black people believe the same things.
08:41 PM on 12/01/2009
It is a civil rights issue. And a human rights issue. I find it odd that a culture that worships starlets who have kids out of wedlock makes an issue out of other people wanting to get married. Personally, I think marriage is an artificial concept but that is society's norm and it should be a right for everyone.
08:22 PM on 12/01/2009
" I have to wonder: is there an irrational, unconscious fear among some that they might lose their hard-fought civil liberties by championing another's?"

You couldn't be more wore wrong. Your statement is curiously insidious. Black people are not a monolith. You call for harmony, I have to wonder if you have even dialogued with a substantial amount of black people.

It's religion. Period. Studies have shown that religion is the number one driving factor for rejecting gay related legislation, followed by education and age.
09:02 PM on 12/01/2009
My apologies. My intentions were not, as you suggest, insidious. I just remember situations when I was growing up where I excluded others to fit in, even when I myself didn't truly wish to, simply out of fear of being excluded myself. My statement was an honest inquiry as to whether or not this might be another factor in this issue.

I can't say I've dialogued with a 'substantial' number of black people, but I have dealt harmoniously with minorities all my adult life, and have recognized common issues that they have to deal with. I try my best to not add to those issues.

I certainly don't disagree that religion is the main culprit in this issue, however. I'm just not 100% certain it's the only culprit.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
lafon5891
07:51 PM on 12/01/2009
I have to thank you for standing up and saying something about this. Nice work!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
ramsha
07:42 PM on 12/01/2009
I have always been amazed by all the nosy people in this world who take it upon themselves to stand in judgment of others. Religion is certainly not the sole culprit, but it does play a dominant role. You go to your church, temple or mosque and the guy at the helm tells you what is right and what is wrong for everybody. If this concerned only the laws of the land or societal manners it would only teach people to "get along" like Rodney King said. No! He/She preaches, who to hate as he interprets from a text which is many centuries old. It is ironic that the so called 'places of worship' instigates us to hate.
07:18 PM on 12/01/2009
It's possible this has nothing to do with race, but rather, with staying in denial and/or in the closet. People who are comfortable with their sexuality usually can understand someone else's sexuality, at least in theory. So whenever I see a religious figure or political leader throwing stones, I have to ask myself, just what kind of a glass house are they living in?
It's easy to judge in others what you judge about yourself, and it's a good mental distraction from the unthinkable truth of that judgment being true about yourself. Jesus said, "do not judge," and "love your neighbor as yourself." So whatever else is in the bible, it's not more important than that.
07:45 PM on 12/01/2009
Religion is the common denominator; it transcends race. This is the issue that needs to be addressed. Focussing on one ethnic community is counterproductive. I don't care if you bring this issue up in the 9th ward of New Orleans or in lily white Maine. Religious conservatives are not on board with gay marriage. The sooner the gay community realizes this, the further along they'll be.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Awake-and-Sing
named after a great play written by Clifford Odets
08:01 PM on 12/01/2009
I do agree the problem is religion -- people using religious dogmas to hide their prejudices and bigotries behind.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
shamumbo
07:12 PM on 12/01/2009
When a community stand against rights for gays, it is hurting some of its own adult children who are gay. That is sad, but, attitudes can change over time.
06:56 PM on 12/01/2009
I'm sorry, but I don't attribute this way of thinking to most black people. We as Black Americans are no strangers to "the gay" as Rachel Maddow calls it. In the matter of gay rights, some folks can get with the concept and others can't. Most Black Americans have someone in their family or work with, or know someone who is gay. I think you can blame the fear of legitimizing gays to the evangelical right. I think Black Americans already know, as you said, the plight of human rights. So don't pay attention to the polls about this issue in our community if that's what you used as your foundation for your beliefs.