Potty training seems really easy. I mean, you're bigger and smarter than your toddler, right? Well, definitely bigger. Yet, when you try to potty train, somehow, you end up using all your brain cells (that weren't killed by pregnancy) and still not ending up with a toddler who's dry through the night. I've therefore concluded that potty training is harder than getting an advanced degree, for many reasons, none of which have to do with getting paid more money down the line.
1. Both of them involve comparing yourself to others.
Grading on a curve means that you're in direct competition with everyone else in your class. Potty training your baby means that you're in direct competition with your sister-in-law, your neighbor and moms on sitcoms. And your mother, 30 years ago. (Spoiler alert: You lose.)
2. Both of them require all of your intelligence.
Whether you're pushing yourself to understand statistics or reading every book known to man on potty reward charts, both of these endeavors require you to be super smart. And wily. See my next point.
3. Both require outside-the-box thinking.
You can't write a thesis without original and creative thinking. And you can't figure out that your toddler will poop for graham crackers, but not for M&M's without some creativity either. Or that the sticker chart only works if it's supplemented by jelly beans, rendering it not a sticker chart. Moving on.
4. Both require perseverance.
Years of training in your chosen field require diligence and stick-to-it-iveness. As does trying to potty train at two years, 26 months, 28 months, 31 months and 37 months (if you don't say "three years," it sounds better).
5. Both require social support.
In grad school, you went out drinking with friends to blow off steam. Now you go on Facebook and message your best friend with pictures of your urine-soaked carpet. Half a dozen of one, etc.
6. Both involve diapers.
Some of those exams are timed, and you don't want to take a bathroom break. Just kidding... Or am I?
7. Both make you extremely proud of yourself.
You finally have that diploma to show how hard you worked. And you finally have a toddler (or a preschooler, no judgment) who wears underwear. Which one makes you prouder? Well, which one involves not having to touch human waste anymore? Bam.