Ten Tremendous Women Who Never Married

I saw the movie Coco Before Chanel last weekend and am thrilled to add Coco Chanel to my list of extraordinary women who never got married. Don't get me wrong, I'm a fan of married women -- my mother especially -- and I'm not opposed to being one someday. However, I've decided it's best not to count on, and I won't force it to happen just for the sake of making my aforementioned mother happy. In the event that it doesn't happen for me, the following women serve as a sweet reminder that you don't need anyone but yourself to live an incredible life and have people remember you long after you're gone. (Listed Chronologically):

1. Joan of Arc - The original tomboy. Born a peasant in eastern France, Joan dressed as a solider and led the French army to several important victories during the Hundred Years' War.

2. Queen Elizabeth the First - Life was off to a rough start for Princess Elizabeth when her father (Henry VIII) had her mother (Anne Boleyn) beheaded. For years, there was much dispute over who Henry's rightful heir was. When Elizabeth was finally crowned queen at the age of twenty-five she went on to reign for forty-four years--an impressive tenure for any monarch.

3. Jane Austen - That's right, the original chick-lit author never got married. She received one proposal when she was twenty-seven. She accepted it at first then rejected it within twenty-four hours. She then wrote a letter to her niece saying, "Anything is to be preferred or endured rather than marrying without Affection." Austen's beloved novels are: Pride and Prejudice, Mansfield Park, Sense and Sensibility, Emma, Northanger Abbey, and Persuasion.

4. Louisa May Alcott - Author best known for her book Little Women. She once explained her spinsterhood in an interview, "... because I have fallen in love with so many pretty girls and never once the least bit with any man."

5. Susan B. Anthony - Next time you find yourself in the voting booth, ladies, take a moment of silence for Miss Susan. She spearheaded the suffrage movement. If not for this tenacious woman we would not be able to do the following: vote, wear pants, receive a higher education, and stay single if we so choose. The 19th Amendment (granting women the right to vote) is also called the Susan B. Anthony Amendment.

6. Florence Nightingale - Although best known as a nurse, Florence was also a writer and statistician. She never married, but this was not from lack of opportunity. She believed, however, that God had decided she was one whom he: "... had clearly marked out ... to be a single woman."

7. Clara Barton - Another notable nurse as well as a teacher and humanitarian. Clara founded the Red Cross. Need I say more?

8. Mary Cassatt - One of the few female Impressionist painters. Mary was born in Pittsburgh and spent much of her adult life in France. She decided early in life that marriage would not be compatible with her career. Her posthumous paintings have sold for as much as $2.9 million.

9. Coco Chanel - A legendary clothing designer who changed the face of fashion forever and who's empire still bears her name. Lady Chanel was the only fashion designer to appear on Time Magazine's "Most Influential People of the 20th Century."

10. Oprah Winfrey - Hello!

Honorable Mention: Gloria Steinem - Gloria spent her younger years at the helm of the second-wave feminist movement saying things like, "The surest way to be alone is to get married." Then, after she had done everything one could hope to do in a lifetime, she fell in love. She got married at the age of sixty-six and made no apologies. She married David Bale -- actor Christian Bale's father. Tragically their marriage only lasted three years as David died of brain lymphoma. Although devastated I'm sure, Gloria continued on her way doing the work she loves. Her place in history had been established long before she met and married Mr. Bale.

 

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Comments

[granamica]

Jane Austin is a red herring. She was from a family with class but not enough and the money was gone. She wasn't suitable and I find it rather sad. Still it is reason to celebrate that we don't come with dowries and names from our familiesinto a marriage anymore--just what WE bing in.

[CatTheGadfly]

I LOVE IT. That is so fantastic.

However, I'd like to see more 20th-21st century women who could have had careers AND marriage -- because many of the ones on the list were from time periods where it really was an "either/or" (though that does not minimize the accomplishments, social pressures were, admittedly, different)

Please follow up with the 10 Fertile Married Women Who Chose Not To Become Mothers.

(With sincere apologies to those who want to bear children but can't -- but that's not what I am referring to).

As single women get tired of hearing "Why don't you marry?" I get tired of the next step: "With genes like yours, why don't you pass them along?" and so forth.

[Samara O'Shea - Huffpost Blogger]

Good point – I never thought of it that way – as these women having to choose between marriage and career. I just stand in awe of them because they chose not to get married in a time when not getting married was unheard of. They really had no choice and they made it anyway. How brave and progressive they were!
One woman I didn’t mention (because she was married) is Elizabeth Cady Stanton. She was Susan B. Anthony’s partner in crime. She worked just as hard as Susan on securing suffrage for women and she had a husband—not to mention seven children. She was the rare bird who had marriage and a career way back when.
I hear you on the “not wanting children” clause. I haven’t decided for sure if I want them, but I’m leaning toward no as I’m thirty and my biological clock isn’t really ticking. I was visiting a friend last weekend who just had a baby, and I was playing with her beautiful daughter. My friend said, “Playing with her doesn’t make you want a baby.” I said, “Nope!” and kept playing.
I get that list together for you ASAP =)

[mmmd]

Great post. It's kind of sad that while men have no problem having it all--work, spouse, children--- women often have no choice but to settle for part of the list. Marriage and children, while quite a bore if forced on one, can be one of the most enriching things in one's life if acquired by personal choice.

In Florence Nightingale's time the choice was between marriage and career. Nowadays, balancing marriage and career has pretty much become the norm. Now for the working woman it's either children or her career. My career is a very busy and competitive one, and most of my friends have not yet found time to have children. Or else, they just gave birth to them, and other people take care of them from day one. The point I'm trying to make is: in today's high pressure world, a fertile married woman not having kids can be out of necessity instead of choice. And that's the same as having kids under social pressure. It's not you who's in the driving seat.

What would be truly cool is if it was allowed for women to take a couple of years off to have children (if she wished to) and then come back and join the workforce without repercussions. Then we would pretty much have it all.

[Kathryneo]

Hi Samara,

I really loved this. Even though I have been married for 23 years, I have always been of the position that a woman does not need to get married. I think, really, the best reason to get married is to have a family. If a woman doesn't want children, there is no reason to tie that knot.

Most important for a woman is to always retain her independence. And the women you've highlighted here have done that.