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Sarah Buttenwieser
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Entries by Sarah Buttenwieser

Family Shaping

(2) Comments | Posted January 22, 2013 | 10:18 AM

Between the birth of my aunt and the birth of my mother five years later, my grandmother almost had twin boys. They were, I was told, stillborn. I am pretty sure the pregnancy did not go full-term, but little narrative was offered and even fewer facts. Even now, I can...

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Trying to Imagine the Boy's Flight

(4) Comments | Posted August 29, 2012 | 4:52 PM

Many years ago, I spoke as an alumn and trustee to incoming students at Hampshire College during their convocation program. At the picnic that followed, I chatted with parents of first-year students. They wore worried, proud, sad expressions on their faces. Their eyes appeared glassy, tears barely contained. I felt...

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Breaking the Code of Parental Silence

(5) Comments | Posted June 11, 2012 | 10:24 AM

Before I had my first baby, I wouldn't have believed that I'd want to talk about the contents of diapers with anyone. Digestion being babies' chief occupation, talk about poop we sure did. It helped to have friends equally in the throes: hours spent in discussion of diapers and burp...

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We Are In Texas Now

(7) Comments | Posted March 20, 2012 | 5:40 PM

Last night before I went to bed, I read a piece in the Texas Observer that's making the rounds. The writer, during her planned pregnancy with her second child, learned in that shockingly awful way -- a routine ultrasound -- that the son she'd been eagerly awaiting with her husband...

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Being Honest About My Biracial Daughter and Long-Haired Son

(31) Comments | Posted May 5, 2011 | 1:49 AM

I think about "passing" a lot when I walk on the beach.

I'm a white woman with graying but formerly dark hair and olive skin. I tan easily. I'm mother to four, three I gave birth to and one I adopted. That last one, the adopted girl, is biracial --...

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Choices: 2011 and Beyond

(6) Comments | Posted March 2, 2011 | 12:51 PM

When I was a senior in high school, my mother did not want me to have sex.

This did not stop me.

So, I didn't tell her.

And here's a little more: It was 1981. Once I finally admitted, a few weeks after becoming sexually active that I was indeed...

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Truck-Loving Girls and Ballet-Dancing Boys: Why Raising Ungendered Kids Isn't So Simple

(100) Comments | Posted February 11, 2011 | 8:29 AM

When people asked what I was having while I was pregnant with my first child, I wanted to say, "Kittens." But instead, I answered, "Baby." Boy or girl, I didn't find out until the featherweight human emerged. Turned out he was (is) a beautiful boy. I didn't pick the word...

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