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Saru Jayaraman

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Where Are You Taking Your Mom to Eat This Mothers' Day?

Posted: 05/11/2012 1:08 pm

Of course you're taking your mother out for brunch this Sunday.

In fact, Mother's Day is one of the highest grossing days in the restaurant industry. But what about the mothers who are serving your mother?

I know I never used to think about these women. As a New Yorker I ate out almost every meal, and celebrated not just Mother's Day but almost every occasion in a restaurant, never thinking once about the people touching my food. But after spending the last decade trying to improve wages and working conditions for restaurant workers through the Restaurant Opportunities Center (ROC), and getting to know their stories, my dining experience has dramatically changed.

The minimum wage for tipped workers has been frozen at $2.13 per hour for the last 21 years. Our research at ROC shows that bussers across the country are generally paid the minimum, and the vast majority of them don't receive paid sick days or health insurance.

Last month, Sen. Tom Harkin of Iowa introduced the Rebuild America Act, which proposes increasing the overall minimum wage of $7.25 and increasing the subminimum wage for tipped workers to $5.

Even with tips, a restaurant server's median wage is around $8.67, below the poverty line for a family of three.

More than a quarter of the almost 6 million women who work in U.S. restaurants are moms, and one in 10 are single mothers.

Now that I am a mother I think about this even more.

A few months after my daughter was born in 2010, we took her on her first restaurant outing, right around Mother's Day. My husband Zach and I had decided to take a springtime trip to Santa Cruz, Calif., and we decided to stop at a "healthy foods" restaurant for Mother's Day brunch. We took a lot of pictures and laughed at the funny faces my infant daughter made.

As I sat there, I couldn't help noticing that all of the servers who greeted and served us were white and all of the bussers were Latina women. I watched these Latina women work their tails off throughout our meal. They moved chairs, collected an impossible number of dirty glasses in one hand and dirty plates in the other, ran about the restaurant putting bread on the tables and refilling water glasses, generally engaging in the most physical labor of anyone in the front of the restaurant.

I also knew these women probably struggled to put food on their own tables, because restaurant serving staff have three times the poverty rate and use food stamps at double the rate of the rest of the American workforce. And with such low wages and no paid sick days, these women often can't afford to take a day off when they're sick.

In fact, two-thirds of the thousands of workers we've surveyed at ROC reported having cooked, prepared and served food while sick. As a mother, I don't ever want my daughter eating in any place where the people touching her food are sick and too poor to be able to take care of themselves.

After we ate and paid our bill, I decided to say something to the manager. I praised the hard work of the bussers and asked if they were ever given the opportunity to advance to a server position.

The manager was caught off guard, but he answered amicably. He said that none of the bussers had ever said they wanted to move up. I told him that as a customer it was important to me to eat in restaurants where the staff was provided with decent wages and benefits like paid sick days, and as a mother it was important to be for my daughter to grow up in a world in which everyone had the opportunity to advance. He said he appreciated my point of view and comments, and I left.

That experience gave me a lot of hope. It wasn't that I imagined that my comments alone would change the industry or even that restaurant. But over the last decade I've seen the power that consumers have to change practices.

So this Mother's Day, wherever you take your mom, ask the manager at the end of the meal about the hourly wage of servers and bussers in the restaurant before tips, and whether they provide paid sick days.

As a mother, please do this for the sake of the millions of moms who serve us daily, and for the health of all our children.

Saru Jayaraman is the Co-Director of the Restaurant Opportunities Centers United (ROC-United) and an Assistant Professor of Public Law at Brooklyn College, City University of New York. A graduate of Yale Law School and the Harvard Kennedy School of Government, she is the author of Behind the Kitchen Door: What Every Diner Should Know about the People Who Feed Us, forthcoming from Cornell University Press. The piece was written in association with The Op-ed Project, which seeks to expand the range of opinion voices.

 
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10:54 AM on 05/14/2012
"Even with tips, a restaurant server's median wage is around $8.67, below the poverty line for a family of three." Who said the lowest skilled job is meant or supposed to provide enough to keep a family of three (curious, not four??) above the poverty line. It is the number of workers with the skills necessary to do the job and the number of jobs available that drive the wages of workers (or ought to).

If you want to make more than the wages of a waitress, then you need to acquire the skills of one whom makes more and pursue that career. It should not be the requirement or even desirable to have every job provide enough to keep a family of three above the poverty level.

By that logic, why stop at simply the poverty level? Let's raise the minimum wage to $100K and then everyone will be rich. Actually, why stop there let's make everyone a 1%er and make the minimum $380K.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
donnyraindog
Grass shack nailed to a pinewood floor
09:05 PM on 05/13/2012
I've been in the service industry as waiter ,bartender and chef since the late seventies.Any decent front of the house worker is making well over double whatever the min. wage for all workers ,not tipped, is at any place i;ve ever been.
08:59 PM on 05/13/2012
I wouldn't do it while out for a Mother's Day meal. It's supposed to be in honor of one's mother, not for activism.

Now if your Mother decides to ask because she wants to know, that's her prerogative as it's her occasion. But don't bring the subject up; enjoy family time together.
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HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
way2sunny
07:39 PM on 05/13/2012
I've heard this argument before. It has one thing in common with the ever-popular "abolish the tipping custom and pay every restaurant worker a living wage!" argument. The ONLY way to implement such a thing would be if every single restaurant in an entire state put the change into place at the exact same time. All of them. Because of course prices would rise dramatically. It's not going to happen, people.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
cdecisneros
my micro bio is empty because I went to the micro
03:59 PM on 05/13/2012
Florida wanted to lower the minimum wage for rest workers more.
02:04 PM on 05/13/2012
Another person living in a dream world.
01:37 PM on 05/13/2012
We host Mother's Day at our house. Spending money at a restaurant is a waste of money. The food is better when the family prepares it and there is no limit to how long you can enjoy yourselves. All of the families that blow their money at restaurants every weekend on several times a week also lease cars and go on expensive vacations. Thay are now behind on their mortgages and never funded their kids college fund. After they lose their house, somebody in my family will buy it at a discount for and rent it back to their ilk. I can't remember what was the author talking about? Oh yeah -- wages for restaurant workers. From what I remember, that waqs a great job with a good deal of under the table tips. It was also a very hard job since you are mving your entire shift. Americans now whine about conditions now because of the liberal left. Being a waiter/waitress was a great job but if you want more money try not to make it your career.
George Picard
Send lawyers, guns and money
09:40 AM on 05/13/2012
The mothers in my family ditch the men on mothers day, not to mention the kids and go to brunch.
alunsulen
Digging the liberal hatred!
05:15 AM on 05/13/2012
I always patronize chains which stick it to the libs.
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HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
MizLiz
Yellow Dog Democrat
01:52 AM on 05/13/2012
Out? No way. The weather is going to be perfect, and the whole family is coming over for a HUGE barbeque. Paper plates and plastic forks...Mom's not doing dishes, no way.
01:42 PM on 05/13/2012
Same comment I made basically. Good for you. Save your money and let the grandchildren walk around a yard instead of hiding under a restaurant table. Take the savings and invest it in the future of the Mother's family.
fullofmitt
Willard was a rat in a movie!
08:16 PM on 05/12/2012
The restaurant industry pays a salary much under minimum wage..but TIPPING raises the pay way past that number. If restautrants paid minimum wage..guess who would pay MORE for their meals??? THE CUSTOMERS! I agree that pay should be higher..but HOW without raising meal prices???
01:45 PM on 05/13/2012
Oh... come on. Times are great right now. Businesses are thriving. Let's help these restaurants out by raising their costs of labor. Food prices have already gone through the roof (although Bernanke and Obama would never say it). Between rising food and rising labor costs, maybe we can make a Denver Omelet cost $15.
11:58 AM on 05/12/2012
Weird how the first things Americans think of when there's a holiday is FOOOOOOD. LOTS of food. Ever notice that?
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
haggis MacBagpipe
Duns Scotus was right!
06:47 AM on 05/13/2012
That's true - but not just not for Americans It is a tradition as old as time throughout the world.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
deminmo
just looking for answers
10:52 AM on 05/12/2012
I am taking my Mom to a local cafe that is owned and operated by
a lady and her husband. She cooks, and he does whatever else
needs to be done. They have one other employee during the summer
months and that's their daughter. The owner used to work for the
former owner as a cook. We prefer local businesses to chains.
10:51 AM on 05/12/2012
"...Of course you're taking your mother out for brunch this Sunday..."

Such a blanket - and wrong - statement.

Home cooking for Mom.
03:56 AM on 05/12/2012
Reality Check Saru Jayaraman......we'll be having Mother's Day at my house.......we and millions of other Americans stopped eating out a good long while ago. Not that long ago, we went to DisneyWorld twice in two years.....now, we don't even go to Taco Bell.