The following is a conversation I find myself having every year around Mother's Day:
Acquaintance: Wow Scout, Mother's Day is coming up. That must be a big holiday in your house.
Me: Why would you say that?
A: Well, you know...since you have lesbian mother's, and all...
M: Oh, right.
A: So, you must be doing something pretty big for it, huh?
M: ...oh shoot, it's this weekend, isn't it...I totally forgot.
A: Do you have to buy them both gifts?
M: No. I actually don't really buy them anything. Sometimes I make a card or something.
(even more awkward silence)
A: Well, I have to go... See you around!
Mother's Day at my house is no different because I have two moms; I simply have to say the cheesy "Happy Mother's Day, I love and appreciate you!" line twice instead of just once. And instead of making one plate of breakfast in bed, I have to make two.
I still make one card, maybe get one gift (which is often just a homemade coupon for me to clean my room once during the coming year), and go out for one dinner.
In fact, my life is no different from anyone else's on any of the other 364 days of the year either.
Having two moms has always been unusual, but it's never been strange. I first remember this issue coming up when I was 5 or 6, and asked my mother Joan if she was "a boy or a girl." She said she was "a girl", and I never really questioned it. It seemed natural; what's so strange about having loving parents?
Maybe it's hard for you to believe that it's never been odd to me. In fact, there have been "incidents", and my mother was always sure to use them to her advantage at major donor events or in her speeches during her tenure at GLAAD. One story my mother told often occurred when I was in 5th grade, and some kids at the pool ragged on me for having two moms. I simply turned to them and said something like "You never know, you might turn out to be gay too, so you should really just cut it out."
I find it interesting that I don't actually remember this, nor any other "incidents" though I'm sure they're all totally true. I think it's because I've always been so content in my world - a world that is a safe, privileged, happy one. So, the questions confuse me more than they offend me. I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything that I could get from a dad, except for having someone who scratches his balls while watching Jets' games.
So, I don't have a dad. Lots of people don't have dads; it's just that I have double the amount of motherly annoyances than the rest of my friends.