I love fast cars. Enter the Audi R8 supercar. OMFG.

I get a massive amount of e-mail -- almost 300 per hour at one point during major media -- which is why I outsourced my inbox in the first place to virtual assistants.

Sometimes, though, comes a snort-worthy e-mail -- a zinger exciting enough to make me choke and spurt morning coffee out of my nose like a fire-breathing dragon (not recommended).

Here is...