Mickey Mouse is Eighty Today and I'm Still Donald Duck Quacking for Revenge

It came as a surprise to me to learn that Mickey Mouse is eighty today. He is forever young, although he was even around a few years before I was born. Truth is he was never one of my favorites. As a child I found him cheerful, amiable, loveable, and annoying as all hell. Although I loved Mickey and read all of his adventures in those newspaper comic sections and Big Little Books of my youth I could never identify with him. He was too gentle, too good natured, too much the All American Mouse, the Tom Sawyer of mice, while I allied myself with the Huck Finn Duck. Indeed, it was when I discovered Donald Duck that the Disney charm began to work on me. I knew at once that I was a born Donald, irritable, vengeful, more given to quacking in frustration than squeaking in joy, capable of loving (remember that delightful Daisy?) seeking a world of justice in a world of chaos, but happiest when getting a bit of my own back. And it is the Donald in me (not his namesake impostor Trump) that leaves me a bit unsatisfied after this historic and thrilling election.

It is clear to me that my man Obama in his infinite Mickey wisdom will not exact revenge against his enemies. No eye for an eye for Barry O. Not for him my favorite quote "revenge is a dish best served cold." In fact he will invite all those slandering, lying, dishonorable enemies to his inaugural birthday party and some of them into his government. He is far too smart to do that vengeance bit, unlike me, the quacking Donald who wants to see Lying Joe Lieberman drawn and quartered and processed by Armor Meats; returned to Connecticut as the first kosher ham; John McCain chained to a tape recorder where he will forever be obliged to listen to his own calumnies and libels while exiled in Arizona with no one but Cindy for company; Sarah Palin harnessed to her Dude husband's snowmobile beside a team of huskies and forced to cover two hundred miles of Alaskan ice and snow in her illicit Manola Blanhik shoes (gotcha?), and while I'm at it I want all those Hedge Fund Hannibal Lecters and mortgage bankers who devoured our once thriving economy to be forced to dine forever in the slammer on their own big toes. None of this will come to pass under the Mickey Obama Presidency. Alas. Donald -- the spirit of retribution -- never wins. If he did would Henry Kissinger still be walking around free, smugly offering advice to the powerful rather than fearfully standing trial in some world court while wetting his bespoke tailored pants?

The comic books of my time with Terry and the Pirates, Smiling Jack and Nancy and Sluggo provide an excellent guide to life. I see Paulson and my infantile, feverish brain goes immediately to Big Stoop, the lumbering presence in Terry who stumbles about much as Paulson does, wildly and stupidly throwing money at problems and missing them. I see Condi Rice as the fork tongued Dragon Lady and W as the waddling Penguin, and where the Donald in me sees prison for those evil birds, our Mickey sees a smile and a pardon. Forget Rove and Cheney! Mickey chooses to regard them as rascals rather than as reactionary revolutionaries who tried to destroy our Constitution and nearly did so. Damn it, we Donalds never win. But I still want to wish Mickey a Happy Birthday. And I hope he accepts my gift of some well packaged retribution. Barack, try it. It's so tasty, eaten hot or cold. But I suspect you won't. You are far smarter than I am, tied as I am to my old fashioned Old Testament emotions. And while I'm being biblical, bless your Presidency, but once in a while let the Donald in you come out and play.

Comments

[tigerlille]

Well, Obama may not be seeking retribution, but by god, he's not going to offer Sarah Palin a cabinet position!

[Badbone]

So how long will Obama be "your man", then? He disapointed me to no end in his failure to take the Bush team to task. So how much capitulation by Obama is enough for you to say "enough!"?

[eden4barack08]

"Capitulation"??? The guy hasn't even done anything yet, for Criss' sake!! Let him at least get bloody inaugurated, will ya?? Sheeeeeesh!

[midknightryder13]

Do you not understand -- BHO is the President-ELECT. Can we at least let the man take the oath of office first?

[dapperd72]

Sherman took the words out of my mouth here, folks. As far as I'm concerned, Quentin Tarantino's series, "Kill Bill: Volumes 1 & 2" should be a model of justice for how the Dems would treat the GOP, particularly all the aforenamed culprits in this article, but we all know Barry's too congenial to consider such a proposition. Lieberman is just a symptom of a huge underlying problem with the Dems' collective lack of spine and by allowing him to keep his chairmanships, whether or not due to his public threats against the leadership, gives him the last laugh matching his hubris after he ran against Lamont following Ned's defeat over him in the 2006 CT Senate primary. I'm sure Barry rejected the premise of Tarantino's "Kill Bill" films, "Revenge is a dish best served cold," but a bit of just deserts would be just what the doctor ordered in the name of Constitutional defense, integrity and intellectual honesty. I've never been a major fan of Tarantino's work, but that series struck a chord, especially in this political climate. I also find Donald Duck's renegade nature to be more in line with what the founding fathers fought to defend than Mickey Mouse's comparitive cowardice. Thanks for a cathartic post, Sherman.

[Pinky2]

Obama is still acting as a Rorshach blot, isn't he? Every drop of bile in a Democrat's system is being urged on this man. He isn't going to do it like usual, people. Simmer down and save the outrage for something bigger than Holy Joe.

[BuffaloJump]

Mickey needs to understand that the Beagle Boys have been at it, and Donald
as attorney general might be a great idea.

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