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Guinevere84's Comments

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Next Steps for Sandy Hook: Surviving Guilt

Next Steps for Sandy Hook: Surviving Guilt

Commented Dec 22, 2012 at 10:07:21 in Healthy Living

“You assume wrong. I receive no benefits as he did not die of a "service related death," meaning I have no access to VA care. They are wrong about that, I think.”
Next Steps for Sandy Hook: Surviving Guilt

Next Steps for Sandy Hook: Surviving Guilt

Commented Dec 21, 2012 at 11:36:31 in Healthy Living

“My husband wanted to die in a murder suicide on our first wedding anniversary. He was a Veteran and suffered (I believe, but the government doesn't) from PTSD. He had a "successful suicide" as the doctors call it. I lived. This was May 31, 2009. His family blamed me, and stopped speaking to me, and I have been unable to form any lasting friendships since. The grieving continues. I work full-time, but have been very sickly since my husband's poisoning of me didn't work (i believe there are lasting effects), immunosuppressed from chronic stress, and am always close to losing my job due to illness. Of course I still feel guilty to be alive, but I do my best at it anyhow. Therapy and medication have proved useless. That's my story.”

Mollyannie on Dec 23, 2012 at 08:15:49

“I am sorry you are having difficulties, but have to admit I am unable to understand why you feel giulty about being alive. I understand grief at the loss of your husband.

I hope you will be able to find peace.”

DrVivian on Dec 22, 2012 at 08:55:04

“I assume that the VA provides counseling for vets and their families. Sad story and am so sorry for your pain. Resonates with parents lifelong sorrow following the war.”
What to Say (and Not to Say) to a Grieving Person

What to Say (and Not to Say) to a Grieving Person

Commented Dec 3, 2012 at 19:32:09 in Religion

“I would so love for that to be the case someday.  it has been 3.5 years of trying so far.....”
What to Say (and Not to Say) to a Grieving Person

What to Say (and Not to Say) to a Grieving Person

Commented Dec 3, 2012 at 14:36:39 in Religion

“When my husband took his own life on our first wedding anniversary, I received not even one casserole. I could not eat or sleep for four months, lost 35 pounds, and even my doctor said, "YOU LOOK GREAT!!!"”

megwright on Dec 3, 2012 at 18:28:31

“I'm so sorry you went through that horrible experience. There are really no words for it. My cousin and my daughter experienced the same thing, and I don't know how they got through it.”

new beginning on Dec 3, 2012 at 17:55:13

“Suicide is the worst thing that we human beings who are left behind will ever deal with... So many questions that can never be answered...

So sorry for your loss.”

BeFairNow on Dec 3, 2012 at 16:49:50

“Egads! What an awful experience! We live in a society where being thin is prized even above happiness, so people automatically assume if you've lost weight it's a good thing. I've learned that it's worth finding a subtle way to ask if a person is trying to lose weight before giving compliments, e.g. "I'm sure you look smaller (don't say thinner, leaner or fitter, just in case they're ill or grieving!) than you did last time I saw you." It gives them a chance to explain the weight loss if they want to and gives you the chance to reserve your reaction until you know what it should be. More than anything it avoids the possibility of causing distress with unintentional insensitivity. I'm sure the doctor didn't mean it in a bad way but I'm also certain it hurt all the same.”

Justgo4it on Dec 3, 2012 at 16:39:12

“Sorry for your loss. and what that dr. did is unfathomable.. but there are dr's with lousey bedside manners, and that was one of them..”

Shepgg on Dec 3, 2012 at 16:25:07

“I'm sorry too.”

roshni on Dec 3, 2012 at 15:34:21

“The stigma associated with suicide is horrible. People need to realize that there are others left behind who need help and support. I have known a person to cross the street so as to not confront a survivor or suicide. It is terrible.”

forestcats on Dec 3, 2012 at 15:19:05

“I hope you find yourself now surrounded by a better more compassionate community.”

prudencehall on Dec 3, 2012 at 14:59:10

“I'm sorry.”

Big East2012 on Dec 3, 2012 at 14:52:18

“I'm so sorry that happened to you.”
I Only Had One Type Of Sex In My 20s -- And It Was Amazing

I Only Had One Type Of Sex In My 20s -- And It Was Amazing

Commented Dec 3, 2012 at 14:20:13 in Women

“I would have only had sex with one man. My husband. He died after one year of marriage. This article reads as self righteous to people like me who have suffered.”

Nightengale on Dec 4, 2012 at 23:58:12

“if anything I would think that her celebrating the joy of really loving and having sex with one man would affirm your choice to marry the man you loved.

Obviously you might not be lucky twice in a row like that but I hope you do find it again.”

Michelle Anne Schingler on Dec 3, 2012 at 16:30:15

“? I don't understand you guys. She wasn't self-righteous in the least, nor was she imposing any expectations on others. The notion that she's being callous, in any way, is just absurd to me.”

BCorn24 on Dec 3, 2012 at 16:23:12

“Shame on her for writing about her experience, rather than thinking about the people she will never meet and how it will make them feel.”