“So B is cringing at all these "over-sharing" posts, then decides to create a blog devoted to them...? Did I get that right? Hey! You know what? I hate this post. Maybe if I gather as many of them as possible, it won't bother me as much! How did that work out for you B?”
“I agree that "just because someone doesn't want to hear about some kid pooping in a pool doesn't mean they're envious". I also agree that "Some people want and like to be parents. Some don't. neither are wrong". I don't agree that "this is just about oversharing". It is about judging someone's posts, then ridiculing and shaming them by creating a blog about it. Like the majority of those who reacted to my comment, you read what you wanted to read, not what I wrote.”
“I didn't "tell people they can't possibly understand what REAL love is unless they have a kid, and if they HAD a kid, they would think their poop and vomit stories are adorable". Like the majority of those who reacted to my comment, you read what you wanted to read, not what I wrote.”
SouthernBelleBlue on Jul 23, 2012 at 14:20:58
“And, like so many other disconnected parents out there, you assumed the only person I could be talking about was yourself and your own situation. ”
“Thank you for your reply/reaction. Re-reading my post, I realize that I could have worded that differently. There is a term called the "biological clock". Among the female friends of mine who want children (not to mention my lovely wife), I have heard that this clock started ticking a lot louder when they entered their thirties. That is all I have to work with, so "almost every un-mothered" wasn't the best quantifier. (True also, "un-mothered" implies having been without a mother, which was not what I was going for.)
Second, all I am saying is that I don't think it's right to judge someone else's sharing choices on social media. Reading the examples posted above (none of which included pictures of pee or poop, which I agree would indeed be a little tmi), I could understand why these people would have shared what they did. My comment about a parent's love wasn't meant to be quantified--it's not better or worse, just different. There's a reason that these parents have posted these comments, and I get it now. Not because I understand love more than anyone else, just because I understand the kind of love that generates the thought of posting such a thing.
That said, for many, social media can be a stream of consciousness, a way of expressing one's identity. To judge others is totally normal and understandable, but to take it so far as to outright ridicule them (creating a site that bashes "parental over-sharers") is shaming, mean”
Beckie McDowell on Aug 15, 2012 at 09:54:04
“We're all familiar with "biological clock". Anyone who doesn't live under a rock knows the term "biological clock". That doesn't make it any less insulting to say that all women suddenly want babies after 30. If you're not a woman, you don't know, so keep it to yourself.”
“This is a sad sad article, and most of the comments from readers are frankly ironic. I used to judge parents for their obsession with their children too. Then, I was given the gift of fatherhood, and suddenly I understood. Children are simply amazing, and the wonders of parenthood are beyond the comprehension of most without children. For all those who have criticized these parents' posts, I say, Just Wait. For B., my spidey senses are telling me that your normal fear of not having children (the one that almost every un-mothered woman receives for their 30th birthday) has sadly become 'envy'. The truth is that most of us are so self-consumed that we can't even begin to understand the love a parent feels for their child. Until you feel that kind of love, you're bound to judge it. All the comments B. posted for the ridicule of readers are real. Unfortunately, reality is something most people are trying to avoid when they log into their Facebook or Twitter accounts.
Regardless, Much Love to those who want it...”
orangekitties on Apr 3, 2013 at 16:38:48
“Why does this give parents the right to post their children's private parts (the ones these parents profess to love *soooo* much) on the internet, where anyone could see them? Why does it entitle you to the rest of the world's attention? People have been having babies for millions of years.....not to mention every other sexually reproducing animal on the planet. Why does being a parent give you the right to belittle people who chose not to have children, or (did you even THINK of this) want children but are unable to have any? Good parents don't base their entire lives around their children, because these obsessed mombies are left with nothing when their children get their own lives. Children are a blessing, not a requirement.”
Ryana Linette Rogers on Jul 22, 2012 at 21:44:09
“I was sort of ok wih your post until you mentioned the face that being 30 and unmothered sorry thats BS I have absolutely no desire to be a mom! I dont like kids! I can appreciate my freind who has them and want to show them off! however I dont care to hear about your kids potty training! or what color it is. its gross to me just like I am sure most of my freinds dont care what my cats litter box issues are! so I am not envious ! of not having kids I can enjoy my life I love to travel do all the stuff of being motherless ! its def for some people good for them but its not for me!”
Orphanmaker on Jul 22, 2012 at 17:35:21
“It doesnt concern you that youre using this garbage website as a scrapbook for the entire internet to see? I mean, I understand posting a few pictures of your kids; but there are some real psychos out there, on the internet, on facebook. Anyway, these people are not annoying because of their kids, they were annoying long before their kids. Its just on hyperdrive now that they have something to be annoying about.”
Soulslider on Jul 22, 2012 at 17:27:14
“You've drank the cool-aid. This article was written for you. Your explanation is only the verbal explanation of the abnormal/narcissistic updating of every step and face of the child you created and you are so proud of. You don't do it for the baby. You do it for you (and grandparents). I don't mean to sound terse but call it for what it is. Your proud offering to evolution and a homage to how complete this child now makes you. Which seems as "self-consumed" as those without children.”
Eva Duarte on Jul 20, 2012 at 21:15:02
“Hmm.. I was 'mothered' four times by the time I reached 31 (that's right, four of the little buggers). Much as I love them I don't think I know more about love than people without kids. Stunningly there are many ways to learn and develop deep and selfless love and I have known people with and without children who exemplify this characteristic. Also obsession with your own child is not the height of selflessness, after all even brutal dictators are known to dote on their own kids.”
SouthernBelleBlue on Jul 20, 2012 at 14:30:03
“The nice thing about FB is that you and your friends can post great updates about your activities, which I like, especially with a little photo, short and sweet. Stuff like Junior loves his wading pool, or Baby Girl feeds the ducks. Then I can say, aw, sweet! Cute! Looks like fun! Why? Because I generally like my friends and I'm trying to support their choices, and seeing a cute pic of babies and puppies makes everybody happy. But when you tell people they can't possibly understand what REAL love is unless they have a kid, and if they HAD a kid, they would think their poop and vomit stories are adorable, well then you're not being supportive of THEIR choices. Having a baby gives a person a whole new perspective on life, but that doesn't mean that perspective can't be a little off when it comes to the adventures of their toddler. Not ever post is appropriate.”
Jennifer Ramirez on Jul 20, 2012 at 12:17:06
“just because someone doesn't want to hear about some kid pooping in a pool doesn't mean they're envious.
Some people want and like to be parents. Some don't. neither are wrong. this is just about oversharing.”
HS717 on Jul 20, 2012 at 09:45:25
“Wait...what? I'm not B, for the record, but I have a few objections to your post. The first being that "almost every un-mothered woman receives for their 30th birthday" a fear of not having children is ludicrous. I know so many woman (myself included) who hit 30 and still were saying "Nope, not yet!" -- and for the record, I've been married for three years. (Also, as an aside -- un-mothered would probably technically mean lack of a mother, not lack of children, but I digress...)
The second (and more important) point I'd like to make is this -- I am not doubting the strength of a parent's love. Indeed, I hope to feel it myself someday (but not yet!). But a "parent's love" does not extend to showing pictures of your child's pee or poop, or changing the topic of every conversation back to your baby. I have several friends who are parents and they are able to hold extended conversation on topics that have nothing to do with their babies. When you ask them about their children, they glow and can talk for hours, but are conscious not to do so unless prompted.
A parent's love has many facets, and is indeed a beautiful thing. Oversharing, though? Not so much.”
KatieMB on Jul 20, 2012 at 09:29:57
“I'm a parent, and many of my friends are parents. As happy as we are (or might be) with parenthood, none of us feel the need to overshare about our children on FB or judge child-free people. I've interacted with B for several years now, and know that she's not judging parenthood, she's judging the oversharing about parenthood.”