May 15, 2012 at 08:49:05
“I'm Black (mixed race but clearly AA) and gay, and I agree with Tuskin Roberts. You think gay people haven't been oppressed just as long as Black people? Do you recall LGTBQ people being able to be open and well-treated a few 100 years ago? Gay people and people assumed gay were beaten, segregated, even lynched. We were seen as less-than others, inferior, disgusting, dangerous, etc just like Black people. Just because the two issues are not identical doesn't mean they aren't similar/parallel.”
Boissiere Parker on May 15, 2012 at 08:58:21
“I feel you, but again this is my opinion and I am entitled to it. I really hope LGBTers get equality and can marry, why not? It is the right thing to do. But in MY VIEW the 2 should not be grouped together, especially when AA are still being discriminated against. ”
“Stewart has bodily functions funnier and more intelligent than you. He also has a far superior grasp of grammar and the English language. Try cracking an English text book before slinging insults at others' intelligence - you might look less foolish. Probably not, but you can hope.
You clearly don't understand what "socialist" means - just repeating the sad, stale Fixed News party lines and pre-conditioned catch-phrases. I mean, you managed to even slip a Nazi reference into one of the comments below - that's, like, double bonus points for Teabagger Bingo, right? All that's missing is the phrase "gay agenda" and some sort of asinine attack against women's rights/reproductive freedoms, and you've got yourself a BINGO!
It's sad, really, how you all just toe the party line and parrot the sensationalized, reactionary rhetoric programmed into you by the fear-mongers at Fox. So out of touch with reality...”
joeThibo on May 4, 2012 at 11:24:03
“RE: "Stewart has bodily functions funnier and more intelligent than you."
===This is not a race to see who is funnier than another person. So where is your proof on all the other points in your post? How do you know my formal training and education. Is it because you are a know it all liberal socialist progressive and have a clear picture of everything in the world.
Get over yourself because not all liberals have a clue what Socialism is and if they did they wouldn't support giving the government the control over their every decision.
So Please make your points and stop with the attempting to control other people and their thoughts because it just makes you look ignorant.”
“If I were in her position and didn't need the money, I would sell the photos and then donate the entire lump sum to a charity that serves children in some capacity - foster kids, research for birth defects, help for infants born substance-exposed, summer camp for terminally ill children, etc. Then I could tell my child when she was older that one of her fist interactions with the world was to help other children by being on a magazine. It would be a nice lesson to be able to give her on compassion, giving, and altruism.”
pupmobile on May 3, 2012 at 23:51:56
“That would be nice!”
DaisyMay123 on May 3, 2012 at 17:45:56
“What a wonderful thought provoking post Nikita I agree with all you say.
Just wished people would do things like you say and help children in need who otherwise would miss out.”
“I lost whatever modicum of respect I may have had for this man when he made that homophobic tweet because he couldn't handle a bad review. Then he changed the lyrics of "Imagine" to be pro-religion, again lashing out at criticism on Twitter and making asinine statements that he then deleted once he realized how much of a horse's behind they made him look like. Knowing he threatened his ex only reaffirms my low opinion of him.”
Any rational, loving, protective father would fall all over himself to PROTECT his girl from such things, knowing how she could be taken advantage of or hurt. Secondly, the DJ said the father should have one of HIS friends do it - implying that at the BEST, this would be statutory rape due to the age difference. A GROWN MAN, using a 16 year old teenage GIRL for sex. I don't care how "smooth" he is, that's wrong. Especially since the object here is to FORCE HER to change her orientation. If they're not going to respect her right to determine her own orientation and this man is advocating that her father IGNORE her self-identity and attempt to FORCE her to be what HE wants, why would you assume that consent is a priority for them? He's telling this dad to have a grown man come over and have sex with his CHILD, who did NOT ask for this, who very well might not even be ATTRACTED to men, didn't seek out sex with a man (esp a grown man), and who is being put in a position where her father/other grown men are plotting to have her "screwed straight" without her consent or knowledge, purely to FORCE her to change who she is. How you DON'T see serious consent issues here is alarming. This is not reading too much into it, this is purely disturbing, disgusting, and reeks of lack of consent on many levels. Wake up.”
Ty2010 on May 1, 2012 at 17:33:55
“I assumed an acquaintance of his that is somewhat of a pick up artist near her age. Any other interpretation is illegal and would serve to reinforce her preference. Reinforce an undesired preference, risk arrest and have a traumatized daughter that would likely hate you for life, now how can that even be considered a realistic interpretation? The only groups I know of that would use that interpretation would be sadistic rapist types and those against her exposure to a heterosexual relationship because it goes against their agenda.”
“He said "screw", not sex - hardly the implication of gentle, consensual love-making. It's a word with an inherent roughness and lack of regard for the woman involved (which is why it's also used as an insult when you tell someone to go s***w themselves" etc). Even if he HAD simply said "sex", he's STILL suggesting that this girl's FATHER, her DAD, try to get men to have sex with her - men that she did NOT seek out or choose on her own - and that involves her father acting like a pimp and "making her available" to men who want to have sex with her for purely sexual reasons (not out of love, a relationship, etc - JUST sexual gain).
Also, you're totally right about the age difference and the fact that if his daughter IS gay, she would NOT consent to sex with a man. The implication is to FORCE HER to change her orientation through the act of sex with a man. If he's suggesting that her father not only facilitate one of his friends having SEX with his DAUGHTER and essentially acting as her pimp at best (creepy, abusive, and something that CPS would probably remover her for (and I would know, I work for them)), and that her father ignore her natural orientation and FORCE her to be something she's not, why would someone assume that this man even CONSIDERED consent here? Everything else about his statement implies a total lack of regard for the girl, what she wants/doesn't want, perversion of the father/daughter relationship by making the father an accomplice to her sex life, and a crudeness and forcefulness to his word choice.
Ty2010 is clearly the one here reading what he wants into things and simply seems to want to excuse this reprehensible statement. Which makes me wonder what HE is "in denial about that motivates him to" ignore these warning signs.”
“It's also worth noting the language he used - "screw her straight". Not "show her how wonderful straight sex is" or "make love to her" (not that either would be unoffensive, either, but still...). But "screw" is crude, harsh, and the focus of the action is purely on the man and has nothing to do with the woman. There's even a certain tone of violence or roughness to the word, which is why people use the expression "screw you" or "go screw yourself" when they want to tell you off. You don't hear people saying "go make tender love to yourself" when they want to offend you. You don't hear people say "you're so beautiful and I love you so much, I really want to screw you" when they're trying to seduce someone. Language is important, and his choice in words says a lot about the sort of action he was condoning here.
“As a rape survivor, and a gay woman, I find this man's comments to be sickening, cruel, and thoughtless. To joke about a father facilitating the rape of his own daughter is just appalling. This man should be fired.”
LeftRight on May 1, 2012 at 08:02:23
“I hate when I hit post too soon...
I would ALSO advocate much more than "fired"... He should have to pay fines until he's dead, and he shouldn't ever be allowed to work in radio again!”
LeftRight on May 1, 2012 at 08:01:39
“First, I'm soooooo very sorry that you have had to go through that.
Second, as a NON rape victim, and a straight man, I ALSO find this "man's" comments to be sickening, cruel, and thoughtless.....”
Ty2010 on Apr 30, 2012 at 21:06:12
“He said sex, not rape, you're reading into it what you want to. First thought to my mind was a smooth talker, like a young Prince or Bill Clinton.”
DaisyMay123 on Apr 30, 2012 at 17:57:22
“Can't believe this Nikita what a truly stupid man he is and should be fired as you say.”
Ed Baker on Apr 30, 2012 at 17:49:15
“I can't believe they are retaining him. Advocation of any kind of rape, and even worse, "corrective" rape of lesbians - a hate crime......”
MarjorieMcK on Apr 30, 2012 at 17:11:33
“Oh, Honey... they need to do MUCH more than fire him. I'd do the same to the person(s) who hurt you, too, if I could.”
lacrosselamore on Apr 30, 2012 at 17:02:15
“I am a rape survivor and a Lesbian as well. While the 3 of them were rapeing me they were saying they were doing me a favor by makeing me straight.
I am sorry for what happened to us. I hope you are doing OK.”
“Hey, maybe now that money can go to the rape crisis centers that Scott denied funding to! Of course, that would require him to do something involving compassion and humanity, so it's not likely to happen...”
“So, let me get this straight, GOP-ers... Regulations to protect actual children are "nonsensical intrusions", but forcing a woman to be penetrated by a ten-inch vaginal ultrasound wand AGAINST HER WILL, prove to her employer that her contraceptive use is for medical use only (or be fired), or listen to a description of the fetus she's trying to abort (and carry a photo of it around for three days) is just fine and dandy? Yeah, THAT makes sense...”
I simply cannot say enough positive things about these places - they are full of amazing, supportive, compassionate people and they are like an island of safety, support, comfort, reassurance, and security in an ocean of panic, pain, confusion, and isolation. It's heartbreaking and infuriating that Scott is so callously denying them the funding that could help countless victims.”
The days and weeks immediately after a rape are the most intense, terrifying, devastating, confusing, and overwhelming. They're full of intense fear, shame, uncertainty, and isolation. Panic attacks, flashbacks, nightmares, hyper-vigilance, heightened startle response, terror that is triggered by a myriad seemingly innocuous things, hopelessness, feeling that you will never be okay again, and of course being totally overwhelmed and confused about how to handle the legal process of pressing charges, what your rights are, etc. A RCC not only provides an advocate to be with you through the nightmare of a rape exam and police statement, but they also walk you through the whole legal process and tell you what to expect, what your rights are, how to proceed. They refer you to medical services, STI testing, legal aid, etc. they provide counseling, support groups, and crisis services like crisis lines that you can call 24 hours a day if you're caught in a panic attack or feeling despondent. There were many times I called my RCC's crisis line at 2am when I was in the grips of panic and hopelessness, feeling like I couldn't breathe and would never recover. They would talk me through it, provide a supportive presence and an ear to listen, help me focus and reassure me that yes, I WOULD get better and get my life back. Just having them tell me "this is normal, you're not the only one to feel this way," comforted me so much.
DaisyMay123 on Apr 26, 2012 at 07:53:10
“Oh Nikita I am speechless and wondering if this man is fit for the job. Rape Centres are really needed everywhere and do need all the funding they can get and I applaud all their hard work, but this guy has no idea at all does he and I am surprised his family and female staff haven't told him he's wrong in all this.
His decision isn'g going to achieve anything, it will just mean longer times to wait to be seen and perhaps even put women off attending and they will then have to face the horrors of rape themselves, it's unthinkable.
I do hope this decision is overturned and the RCCs get their funding as they are well and truly needed as you have experienced.”
“He vetoed the funding - there was a request for additional funding due to rape crisis centers being under-funded and overwhelmed (note the long waiting list for victims to be seen, which is inexcusable - rape victims NEED immediate help and delays hamper healing). They specifically laid out why they needed the additional funds, what areas were underfunded, how the money would be used, how it would help, etc. Florida lawmakers approved the funding (as they should have) and set aside money in the budget for the RCCs. But Scott, who is governor, vetoed the decision. That means he overrode their decision and the funding will not be made available to the RCCs because he has last say in the matter. It's despicable and heartless and it will do incredible harm to the women and men in FL who are victims of sexual violence who will now have to wait weeks, even months, to get the help they so desperately need in order to heal.
“In this case, Scott's actions affect women AND men - rape does not discriminate. Women might make up the majority of victims, but as a survivor myself I often saw men in the waiting room of the RCC waiting for their own counselors or support groups.”
“Well said! Just as a friendly reminder, however, please remember that men can be and are rape victims as well. I'm a survivor, and often saw men waiting for their counseling apts or support groups in the waiting room of the RCC I attended - too often they're invisible and forgotten because people tend to only think of rape as a women's issue, so I try to gently remind people that stripping the finding from these centers will hurt men as well as women.”
“As a rape survivor, I just want to say THANK YOU for your work as a volunteer - it means SO much! I don't know how I ever would have made it through after my rape without my local RCC - they saved my sanity and helped me heal SO MUCH. The work you did no doubt meant the WORLD to the survivors you helped, and I just had to say thank you from the bottom of my heart. Knowing there are people like you out there helps me sleep at night!”
Vivvy on Apr 26, 2012 at 09:30:47
“NikitaAhn, I am humbled by your thanks, and awed by the strength you show as not only a survivor, but an advocate and fighter for others who may experience the horror you did. For ANYONE who has ever been in your place, and for those who volunteer and assist, it is unconscionable that this man would be so cold-hearted as to veto funding.
I started volunteering with friends many many years ago when all we had was our time, willingness, and determination. Phones were forwarded to the one on duty, and we would take off in the middle of the night. At first, police weren't supportive of our presence, but they finally and reluctantly realized that a female advocate was most important to help the victim focus and participate in the process. After all, most officers then were men, and a woman who had been raped was not inclined to feel comfortable discussing her ordeal with a man!
We have come so far, and simply canNOT lose this hard won support! Nikita, you have my respect and best wishes for a healthy life free of fear! Bless you.”
DaisyMay123 on Apr 26, 2012 at 06:22:46
“Nikita is this guy stopping funding then, not being in the US I don't really understand the post and can the funding be overturned?”
“As a friendly reminder, rape is NOT just a women's issue - men can be and are raped as well. Women make up the majority of victims, yes, but there are more male victims than you might think. I'm a survivor, and you'd be surprised how often I saw men in the waiting room at the RCC I attended for counseling and services, waiting for their own counselors or support groups. Sadly, male victims are often invisible and forgotten - partly because their own shame keeps them silent about their experiences, and partly because our society tends to see rape as a "women's issue". Which is why I try to remind people that rape affects EVERYONE - young, old, black, white, poor, rich, female AND male.”
observer42 on Apr 26, 2012 at 11:13:53
“You are absolutely right. This topic deserves it's own article. Men and boys get raped by both male and females. I suspect the number of victims is very under reported, and the emotional damage is equal to or greater than that of females.And it is so hard for a man in this society to acknowledge he's been raped. If a woman is the perp, other guys think he got "lucky." and do not realize that rape is not about sex, but about power and violence and control. If the perp was male, he often fears he is gay, or when the victim is gay, he may think he brought it on himself.
I'm sorry for the crimes you endured, and proud of you for your courage. Thanks for the friendly reminder.”
“According to the article, she DID lay out the needs and the lack of funding specifically. This is not about Scott eliminating what he perceives to be duplication of services, this is about Scott simply not giving a d*mn about women and men who are victims of sexual assault. To the GOP, ANY social service program is seen as unnecessary and wasteful, no matter how noble the cause.”
PathofTotality on Apr 26, 2012 at 11:07:37
“Not disagreeing with you but the "You think they would have asked" comment got me.”