“No. It is tough for all children to accept and understand the impact of divorce. But pile on top of this the fact that the children come from dysfunctional families (it is near impossible to have a functional family with an alcoholic in it), the situation is amplified. They likely already were dealing with depression and trust issues (comes with the dysfunction) and would not recognize a "healthy" move as it was being made.
No matter, if this indeed was the situation, it was a healthy move, and the children can hopefully get the help they need to cope and to mature into fully functioning adults.”
“I don't know about that. She mentions her husband's drinking as a major contributing factor.
"I declared my independence from someone whose drinking was ruining not just his life, but our entire family"...
If a man had said that of his alcoholic and destructive wife, I would not consider it selfish and irresponsible for him to need to extricate himself from such a situation.
I am making a presumption here - for both men and women - that there were numerous attempts to help the spouse overcome the destructive habit. Typically, I think there is. But if all efforts fail, I think a valid choice is to leave.”
RealistBC on Oct 24, 2013 at 18:23:19
“You don't read the comments here, do you?”
Phillip F on Oct 24, 2013 at 06:48:57
“Yeah but with marriage you are supposed to look for ways to help each other not just find the quickest route out once you feel yourself drying up.”
“I cannot agree with your reasoning at all. There is one and only one culprit here, and that is the one who assaulted the boy.”
Lynette Davis on Oct 18, 2013 at 23:13:13
“And you have the right to disagree. Do you or have you, yourself, had any children in the public, private, or parochial school systems? Have you known of any parents present in a school and leaving their child alone with a school principal while they just stood idly by outside the door? I have not. I have had three sons in both public and parochial schools and never once have I known of any parents while in the school leaving their children alone with a principal for disciplinary or any purposes, or even to praise the child for a commendable act. Yes, the principal bears blame for his egregious and perverse act, but the question still remains as to why the parents left the child alone. To give them the benefit of a doubt, maybe they had to take a phone call.”
“I read the article to reflect that it could be a chemical reaction (more/less tolerant) to a behavioral issue in the marriage.
Sorry... behaviors still matter.”
Jewels99 on Oct 9, 2013 at 00:11:57
“How about picking the right person and behaving like a responsible grown up is what matters. Really, this is a weird study because I understand the monogamy / non-monogamy argument but emotions are too complex to narrow it down to one gene,”
jf12 on Oct 8, 2013 at 23:37:11
“"satisfied with their marriages regardless of the emotional atmosphere" is unambiguous. You are not permitted to read it to reflect that it means the opposite.”
“Congratulations, author, on moving forward through a very difficult situation. How we deal with change, fear, difficulties ultimately determines our ability to deal with the rotten stuff that life inevitably throws our way, and come out the other side thriving and ... happy.