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Marriage Advice: Come To An Agreement Rather Than Compromise

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Compromising is almost always one of those things that nobody wants to do, because it implies that you aren't getting exactly what you want. And yet often when you hear people talk about marriage, they talk about making compromises.

The word compromise has never sat well with me. It always seems a bit stifling and implies sacrificing my own needs for someone else's. So instead of compromising, I think of coming to an agreement. In the same way that the word compromise suggests taking away what I wish for, the word agreement suggests I am freely, of my own volition, coming to a decision with my partner that works for both of us. In making this decision, we take each other into account and our goal is to take what we both want and make it work for both of us.

Now, come on, doesn't that sound much more inviting than coming to a compromise? The next time you are having a disagreement, work toward an agreement, rather than a compromise, and you'll find you get there much more easily -- and both of you will feel infinitely better about it.

WATCH:

Watch How the Books Can Help You Now! from Sophie Keller on Vimeo.

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