Why It May No Longer Help to Be a Liberal

While working last night on another blog post for the social media site, Mashable, I was perusing through past tweets of Evan Williams, Co-founder and CEO of Twitter, and I came across this one in response to a Twitter user with the username "brokedad."

Ev wrote:

@brokedad I like your spirit, but I'm concerned about your name. How can you ever be not-broke if it's part of your identity?

It's true. How can we be anything outside of our identity?

Impact on Health Care Debate

As the health care debate has become increasingly contentious, it not only reveals how many differing views there are on this subject, but also how easily we get caught in our identities.

People are adamant, almost as if it were an election year, that the view of their party or political affiliation holds is correct. Yet instead of real dialogue of deep listening and understanding, discussions often end up becoming a clash of egos.

Once our identity sets in, no matter whether it is as a yogi, a democrat, or a Buddhist, like the ring in The Lord of Ring, it has one and only one task. In this case, it is consumed with finding ways to reinforce itself and to put down the views of those it sees as "other." Of course, it is one thing to express an interest in a certain practice or belief, quite another to think that such beliefs or activities are who we are.

What News Do We Favor?

Some time back, there was a story here on Huffington Post of a former Republican mayor in Georgia who was arrested for nudity. The article, only 131 words, had little analysis, yet it got over 650 comments -- a huge amount of compared to most articles.

I think it would be fair to guess that if it was a story of a former mayor who was a Democrat, it would have received significantly less comments, probably no more than a handful. Why? Because negative news about the "other" (that which we view as countering our identity, who we think we are not) in this case Republicans, feeds our identity and ego. "Yeah," we think (and often comment) "look how stupid they are and how right and just I am."

If we think that who we are is our beliefs, then in any discussion our entire sense of self depends on the outcome; if we win, we think there is "more of us," that we are better; and if we lose, we think that there is less of us, that who we are has been diminished or weakened in some way. It is no wonder then why dialogues become so heated.

Our Real Challenge

Some years back Ram Dass told a story of a woman he had worked with who practiced meditation and Buddhism, and whose parents were fundamental Christians. She told him that when she visited her parents, it was very hard because they would get into heated arguments over their differing beliefs. But then she realized that if she did not hold so tightly to those beliefs, could instead practice being present and open. When she did so, the dynamic with her parents shifted. She told him, "My parents hate me when I am a Buddhist, but they love me when I am a Buddha."

This, I think, is the great challenge of our society at this time. Can we step out of our identities that are constantly looking for ways to justify themselves and to put down the other, and open to a deeper presence and wisdom? Can we be Buddhas instead of Buddhists, practice liberal openness instead of being a liberal?

Of course, the issue is not so much what we do or do not call call ourselves: we can just as easily identify as "not a liberal" or "not a Buddhist" and it is just as limiting. The real question is, Can we tap into a deeper intelligence beyond identification with our thoughts? In fact, this could be the only real way for us to survive in the coming years, as living from and trying to reinforce our identities will only create a greater mess, no matter how seemingly well intended.

Though there is needed debate on issues like health care, our real challenge may be less legislative or political, and much more a spiritual one.

***

Soren Gordhamer works with individuals and groups on living with greater mindfulness and purpose in our technology-rich age. He is the author of Wisdom 2.0: Ancient Secrets for the Creative and Constantly Connected (HarperOne, 2009).

Website: http://www.sorengordhamer.com

Follow Soren Gordhamer on Twitter: www.twitter.com/SorenG

Comments

[MeetJohnDoe]

"Once our identity sets in, no matter whether it is as a yogi, a democrat, or a Buddhist, like the ring in The Lord of Ring, it has one and only one task. In this case, it is consumed with finding ways to reinforce itself and to put down the views of those it sees as "other.""

This sentence completely mis-states the buddhist viewpoint.

In case anyone is interested in accuracy.

[khanti]

We always have a choice when perceiving things. See things as they are. If you see with a discriminating mind you will always find differences. It is like the never ending chicken or egg first argument.
As Bodhidharma said, "To see what others cannot see and to hear what others canniot hear."

[khanti]

Being a Buddhist gives you freedom no other religion can offer. But when you show your religious preference to others of different religion you make others discomfortable with you.
I give you a story of Buddhist tolerance.
The late K Sri Dhammanada a well known Sri Lanka monk had took up resident in Malaysia when he was posted to the Maha Vihara there and later became the Chief monk. He had a surgery and while being warded in the hospital a Christian missionary visited him and gave him blessing. Upon realizing that he was Buddhist monk she apologized.
This is what the K Sri Dhammananda told her, "No need to apologize, in fact I should thank you for giving be blessings."
Being a Buddhist there are no fear of superstition; no need for wearing amulets and pendants. Instead you are required to respect other religion and no missionary work converting others against their beliefs. It is not compulsory to keep a Buddha statute or burn incense. This is up to your own preference. Just wish people well and be compassionate to all beings whether seen and unseen.
Your parents have brought you up well, given all they can to ensure you have a good foundation to face the future so it doesn't hurt to tolerate your parents. This is what it means when you are being a Buddha .
When you show your religious preferrence in front of your parents this is beng a Buddhist.

[khanti]

By the way since you have a touch of Zen this is similar to the wind and flag story.

[geerussell]

It's not just negative news about the "other" that draws a lot of comments. It's negative news that implies gross hypocrisy with regard to the positions they claim to champion. A republican making a mockery of "family values" sets off a liberal feeding frenzy the same way that news about a racist democrat or a liberal doing something environmentally unconscious would draw lots of jeers from republicans/conservatives.

[TheBlackCat]

Some really interesting points to think about...how sacred is our identity, how much do our beliefs define who we are?

Great article...but my question is this; where is the line between letting ourselves be open to others, and not too defined by our ideologies...and being dishonest about who you are for the sake of pleasant conversation?

For example, my husband's family are far right conservative Christians. Virtually every opinion I have on every subject is completely offensive to them, no matter how I word it, and they are constantly asking me "baiting" questions with the goal of starting an ideological argument. I want to get along with them...but I feel uncomfortable lying in order to do so.

[Soren Gordhamer - Huffpost Blogger]

I grew up in the Bible Belt of West Texas, and while I had many good time and made some great friends, if I had a dollar for every time someone told me that I was going to hell because my family did not attend church, I would be a rich man.

I think we can view such situations as problems, and that someone is baiting us when he or she should not be, or can see that we are in a spiritual warrior training (or whatever you want to call it) so the baits are great chances to deepen our wisdom. I think the balance is not encouraging or seeming to support beliefs that we do not support, but at the same time not reacting to them. I do not think there is any great method except to be present in the moment, and listen to what wants to come forth.

[TheBlackCat]

"I think the balance is not encouraging or seeming to support beliefs that we do not support, but at the same time not reacting to them. I do not think there is any great method except to be present in the moment, and listen to what wants to come forth."

I think this is very good advice, but here's another question...do you think this "not reacting" to a belief we don't support should still be maintained when the person you are speaking with is speaking an obvious falsehood? For instance, it is one thing for me to not comment when my mother in law tells me that homosexuality is a sin. This is a personal, subjective belief, and you can't really argue with a personal belief.

But what if she then says something which I find not only offensive, but know to be wrong? Say she says, "Homosexuals are much more likely to be pedophiles," and I know there is a John Hopkins and a Harvard study which says homosexuals are no more likely to be pedophiles than heterosexuals.

On one hand, I know that reacting to her statement and countering it with fact will almost certainly be futile, and will only cause conflict while not changing her opinion...on the other hand, I almost feel like it is a moral duty to fight against intolerance when we encounter it.

[Soren Gordhamer - Huffpost Blogger]

Hmm. Just posted a response to you but not sure what happened to it. Maybe it will show up in a minute here.....

[knerd]

Is the screen name "brokedad" an actual identity or merely a word written down during a specific moment?

It does not matter WHAT we call ourselves; it matters WHO we are. We cannot help but label others or ourselves, for It seems to help us get a "fix on the flow." But wisdom comes with actually realizing such labeling is provisional and fleeting.

[BobLablah]

I guess the comment from the twitter dude hit a little too close to home, eh knerd?

[JayDubs]

Good article. Very true. A lesson we should all keep in mind when engaging in honest discourse to solve problems.

I suppose the question is, do we consider the Huffington Post a vehicle dedicated to real discussion or is it closer to a form of entertainment? As is said in the article, it can certainly be enjoyable to affirm one's own ideals.

[Soren Gordhamer - Huffpost Blogger]

Yes, I am all for standing behind what one believes is right, but the question is, Can we do so without the extra baggage of identity?

[JayDubs]

Of course that is a serious concern in a serious discussion. However, if, like me, you're not an actual blogger but simply a poster, how serious a discussion is actually being had? Will my comments affect anyone's opinions but my own? And, if not, what is the harm of a little self-indulgence?

I generally agree with your post. This is just a little devil's advocate argument running through my brain. Feel free to ignore it.

[OutOfTheBlue]

How can one tell the dancer from the dance? This question was posed in an anthropology course on video that was narrated by David Carradine. Unless we have broken away from a culture and adopted views different than that culture, our views may be as our accents--something that we view as virtually objective.

A different question is: What is the most beneficial identity we can adopt? How many of Edward de Bono's Six Thinking Hats do we put on when we look at the world?

[BobLablah]

This is the most intelligent post I have ever read on the HuffPo. I imagine that means you will get some comments calling you an idiot.

[Soren Gordhamer - Huffpost Blogger]

We shall see. Thanks for making sure that there was at least one positive comment.