THE BLOG
10/15/2013 11:01 am ET | Updated Dec 15, 2013

Tetherball-Playing Bear Courted by Republicans, Democrats for 2016 Presidential Run

The black bear seen playing tetherball in Reno, Nevada by hundreds of thousands of YouTube viewers is already being courted by high-ranking officials in the Republican and Democratic parties for a possible run as a 2016 presidential candidate. "That black bear has the persistence, the drive, and the sheer pluck to lead our country into an exciting new era of prosperity," says Republican Party spokesperson/animal wrangler Carl Kalokiann.

Constitutional requirements notwithstanding, the hirsute viral video star is also appealing to factions within the Democratic Party who still do not necessarily embrace Hillary Clinton as their putative presidential choice. "Black bear is a refreshing alternative to tired, do-nothing politics," says an unnamed Democratic insider who has spoken with the bear's handlers during a salmon expedition. "When we dump Hillary in 2016 -- and we will -- that bear may be just the ticket we need."

The black bear has remained silent during this speculation, although sources report it is currently the odds-on favorite to replace Charlie Hunnam in the screen adaptation of 50 Shades of Grey.

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