Can You Order A Person Not To Be Racist?

Laws protect people from discrimination, whether it is racism, sexism or any other form of prejudice. The less we socially sanction racist behaviors, the more we can expect that people will feel uncomfortable displaying these behaviors. Yet, anyone who has been part of a close group discussion knows that when people trust other people, they feel more comfortable expressing their anti-group sentiments. Men will often complain about the habits of women to other men, non-Jewish people will complain about Jewish people and other races will complain about Blacks if there are no Blacks present in the group. When people hold onto their "secret" prejudices, it makes me wonder if we can perhaps do more than "expect" non-discrimination or "order it". If anything, my experience with human nature has led me to believe that people, regardless of color or sex have the propensity to bond by pointing out how "other" groups differ from themselves. Still, I can't help but feel that the "righteous" attitude about prejudice seems inappropriate and dishonest. I have yet to meet a person who truly is not prejudiced.

I have not only come to understand that racial prejudice exists, but I have also come to expect and observe it more than react to it. It works in all directions too. Whites against Blacks, Blacks against Whites, Indians against Blacks, Blacks against Indians-you name it, and it probably exists. The idea that somebody should feel "ashamed" about being racist seems absurd to me, as many racist responses are based on personal experience and have taken years to cement in a person's brain. Feelings of shame lead to complex outcomes. Shame does not only lead to stopping a behavior-it can lead to anger, irritation, and even deeper resentments coming to the surface. In lieu of the recent Gates incident, for example, White people on a radio show aired in Boston expressed their disdain for being called racist in a way that suggested that Blacks were overly sensitive and they were tired of having to "own up" to something just because Blacks were so sensitive. The whole incident appears to have stirred up racist feelings between both groups even more.

Now I can't claim to have the answer as to how to end racism, but I thought that it would be important to express at least one other approach apart from shaming people for being racist. When I am faced by racist people (the situation is usually quite obvious), I will often seek to find in that person, something worth appreciating and then focus on it. For one, it takes the conversation to a completely different place, and secondly, it reduces the anxiety associated with that racism. This allows the conversation to reach a very different outcome than if I were to focus on the racism.

I think that society needs to be more honest about the feelings of racism that are much more widespread than people like to believe. Accepting that these feelings exist is a good first step. Then, trying to understand and refocus on something else is a great second step. Brain imaging studies have shown that even when people consciously think that they are not racist, tests of their unconscious show that they are, and this activates the anxiety centers in their brains. Our prejudicial reactions to people may in fact be deeply wired, and to undo these associations takes more than "fessing up" to what we truly feel, because we may not even be consciously aware of this.

The main point I would like to make here, is that I hold the view that people are fundamentally beautiful even though they can be very misled into areas of decision-making that are horrible and atrocious-take 9/11, the holocaust and apartheid for example. If we truly want to change how people feel, we have to do more than just enforce laws and shame people. I believe that we have an imperative to understand-to take a non-judgmental respite-in the course of our feelings about racism. We have to learn to forgive ourselves, and we have to learn to focus on the strengths of others as well. Doing this will give the racist person's brain's anxiety center a rest.

In the case of Gates and the policeman for example, they probably both held racist views-ideas that have been cemented in their brains over years. What if we took a moment to step back from our reactions, to understand that we do react, but that we can change how we act by reconsideration without shame? What if we understood that there is a biology of prejudice, and that overcoming prejudice requires self-forgiveness and loss of shame before we can truly be citizens who do not judge on the basis of a person's color? I think that we would make a very valuable contribution to the end of prejudice by admitting to our automatic reactions, and then re-examining them with new intentions. Shame seems to me to be unnecessary and counterproductive.

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Comments

[Pippen]

Part 2 of 2

It is also our obligation as a society to examine and understand human behavior. Our society has mysteries that need solving. Why do wealthy people not care about the poor ? Why do all ethnicities gather in with their own kind and avoid other cultures ? Why do children not express the same prejudice and racism as adults ?

I'll give you an example I thought was telling of children.

My fiance was in a grocery store one day with her small children years ago and the smallest boy could not take his eyes off a small black boy inline. He tried to make friends with the lil black boy who kept to himself and smiled. Then later she asked her son did you make a friend ? He replied, "..oh momma he's the most beautiful person in the world !! He's made of chocolate !! And you know how much I love chocolate!­!..."

It seemed to characterize how children accept others with their own understanding without influence. Hopefully he would not have made an effort to eat the lil black boy but who knows. If we just step back away from influencing the children maybe they'll grow up evolved a little more than our generation. And the growth our society will fulfill it's mission.

[Pippen]

Everyone is prejudice but not everyone is a racist. Prejudice is a natural human development to "fear what is different or confusing.­." It kept us alive while we evolved from Austrolepithicus. To keep evolving as Americans we must pursue being around all types of people and not avoid any culture or ethnicity. It's our national duty and our mantra. We're Americans, we're the mixed breed mutts of the world. The wretched refuse who dare to push forward this human experiment.

We're the only nation in the world where we eat, sleep, work and play together with a multi-diverse culture of peoples from around the globe and we're not at war or killing each other at every conflict. We live together. Few other cultures can ever say this has happened. Only in America.

We should express sincere disappointment in people who openly express racism and prejudice. We must continue to evolve.

Part I of 2

[Srinivasan Pillay - Huffpost Blogger]

i respect your openness to being part of a beautiful and diverse america. however, for those who are not this open, i think that intimidation is not an effective way to inspire understanding. disappointment would be a natural and appropriate reaction, but shaming and pseudo-shock (as we sometimes see in the media) can have the exact opposite effect on creating a cohesive society.

your point about children is a very beautiful example of how cohesion can work. i wish that this could work in all directions and that we didn't have both racism and resentment, but these both exist and i think that we have to be mindful of creating a more cohesive society in ways that will not simply alienate those we want to join.

thanks for your comments.

[InedaName]

This is America and people have the right to be racist, sexist, or homophobic. The vast majority of us may not like it or condone it but it is not illegal to harbor bigoted views nor should it be. However, when someone's person, family, livelihood, or property is threatened, harmed, or violated, a line has been crossed and then it becomes a criminal and/or legal matter.

You're free to believe whatever you want, just keep your hands to yourself.

[Srinivasan Pillay - Huffpost Blogger]

i agree that preference about race, sex and sexual orientation exist. and i strongly endorse the fact that behaving in an unfair manner toward a person in these or other groups is wrong. i think however, if if one is aware of a bias that one has, there should be the permission to excuse one's self from a decision due to this bias, or to expose this bias in conversation openly with a possibility of conversation with others.

i am concerned that the harm and violence you speak of is the result of fear that results from the intimidation of feeling as though an opinion is suppressed. it is often helpful to examine generalizations about race, sex or sexual orientation in a convivial manner. everyone can learn.

[nicholasfromWA]

"The idea that somebody should feel "ashamed" about being racist seems absurd to me, as many racist responses are based on personal experience and have taken years to cement in a person's brain."

Wait a minute! Many "racist" responses are also the result of childhood conditioning combined with a lack of personal experiences with the *hated* group. Upon learning that one's hateful attitude is unnecessary, shame seems, to me, a proper reaction.

Furthermore, there's a difference between THINKING someone is an animal, and actually DOING something to hurt/oppress them. Shame, again, seems the proper reaction for someone who is exposed (by virtue of their actions) as a racist....­what I'm saying is, how would I know someone is a racist if they only *thought* as a racist....­once you cross the line & let other people know, then yeah, you deserve to be ashamed...

It's an interesting angle I'm starting to see in more and more places...t­he idea that racism is inherently justified.­..it's o.k., we all do it, etc. It's troubling, to say the least.

[Srinivasan Pillay - Huffpost Blogger]

thank you for your comments. to clarify my position:
1. i do not think that racism is "justified". i think it is a reality that can be better handled by encouraging an openness about expressing one's views on it.
2. in no way do i think that acts of racism should be unaddressed. i just think that shame is not an adequate end point. education and understanding are important ingredients as well.
3. racist thoughts are what i am referring to here. to talk about them would be helpful. to act them out is not.
4. i think that shame is problematic because it can lead to more racism and violence. that is the reason that it can be counterproductive.