You've Come How Far, Baby?

In what can only be regarded as a dirty joke, Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas' long-awaited autobiography is appearing in stores just as a New York City jury has found that New York Knicks coach Isiah Thomas sexually harassed a colleague. The jury ordered Madison Square Garden -- corporate parent of the Knicks -- and its chairman to pay $11.6 million to Anucha Browne Sanders, a former top executive for the team who was fired when she complained about the latter Thomas' inappropriate behavior.

It's about as far as you can get from the days of Clarence Thomas' confirmation hearing in 1991, when sexual harassment was a rather new concept outside of legal circles and a hostile work environment was something women were frequently counseled to tolerate because boys will be boys. During the trial, Browne Sanders described a corporate work environment that resembled a frat house run amok. Thomas was allowed to refer to women he disagreed with as "bitches" and "hos," sex talk was common, groping tolerated, and bad behavior encouraged. We can only hope the Knicks, Thomas, and the organization's chairman James Dolan -- ordered to pay $3 million of the total fine -- have learned their lesson. But please, let's avoid the usual calls for the end of workplace romance that inevitably follows these cases as it did after Thomas-Hill. Harassment is not romance.

In our book, Office Mate: The Employee Manual for Finding -- and Managing -- Romance on the Job, we demonstrate that consensual romantic relationships between employees are a commonplace. Half of all American workers will date a colleague at least once. Of that group, at least 20 percent will end up in a long-term relationship, whether in the form of marriage or living together, with their office mate. Considering that most people seem to manage these situations like the adults they are, calling for an end to office romance smacks of social engineering. And given the numbers involved, it's also unlikely to be effective.

So instead of telling employees that workplace romance is a bad idea -- how bad can it be given that Barack Obama met his then-supervisor wife there -- maybe they should be reminded what distinguishes it from harassment. A few simple ground rules that someone might have mentioned to the Knicks' management: No means no. We all deserve to work in a civilized environment. And people who feel they are the objects of sexual harassment deserve a fair hearing, not a quick trip to the unemployment office.

Sexual harassment is not a crime of passion. It's a crime of humiliation and an act of aggression -- the powerful slapping down the less powerful. Like rape, it doesn't happen because the victim behaved flirtatiously or wore a short skirt. It has nothing to do with expressing romantic interest. It is instead about showing women that their place is at an ironing board, not on an executive board.

Interestingly, the people who best comprehend what sexual harassment is all about are the harassers themselves. When called to account, they frequently point to the accuser's work history as a defense. Just as Justice Thomas wrote in his book that accuser Anita Hill was a third-rate lawyer and a tool of pro-choice abortion forces greater than herself, lawyers for the Knicks attempted to prove that Browne Sanders was an incompetent employee who deserved to be canned despite excellent evaluations from superiors prior to her complaint.

These days, mercifully, most of us are less likely to fall for these ploys. The Isiah Thomas jury certainly didn't. But before you say you've come a long way baby, consider this: No one affiliated with the Knicks besides Anucha Browne Sanders has yet to be fired over this mess. And Clarence Thomas still sits on the Supreme Court.

Comments

[Halsey]

I think a bigger issue is that Thomas (Clarence) got over $1 Million from Rupert Mudoch's publishing arm for his pathetic, wah wah, self-loathing, memoir. He's a sitting justice for criminy sakes!..it's called" wait till you're OFF the BENCH..

okay..got that off my chest.. sexual harassment has evolved..today it can be more subtle,but just as devastating (and I mean for both men and woman...women, while the majority, are not the only victims..it's just that men are less likely to report harassment)

In watching the excellent AMC drama "Mad Men" we CAN see how far we've come..just since the 60's.. I've had relationships with co-workers..was it harassment­..Nope..ju­st bad judgement...I don't recommend it..

[sword]

Because they are both black? Or becaus their names are both Thomas?

[kellygrrrl]

it seems that anytime someone speaks to the sexism and misogeny in the black community, that someone is immediately labeled RACIST.

[livingsp]

This is the first time I realized that Anucha Browne Sanders was fired but no one else was. The disparity of this is appalling - and it does remind me of the Hill-Thomas hearings - and causes the same cringe.

But this creepiness of harassment does have to be separate from respectful relationships - and from what I've read (and will look forward to Ms. Losee and Ms. Olen's book) and experienced - romantic relationships in workplaces can and do work and often quite well. It's all about the people involved. I would think that anyone who harassed someone at the office would not be a very respectful romantic partner in general.

So let's not throw the blanket of sexual harassment on all workplace relationships anymore than you'd throw the blanket of rape on normal, thoughtful consenting adults.

[ReasonIsMyReligion]

Can Anita Hill still sue?

[ReasonIsMyReligion]

Revised: Can Anita Hill sue over Injustice Thomas's NEW BOOK?

[NABNYC]

When we have, historically, passed certain laws to protect women, it usually turns out in the long run that the law needs to be revised to protect everyone. So, for example, current laws prohibit an employer or supervisor from harassing an employee based upon gender, race, religion, ethnicity - certain specified criteria, or creating a hostile work environment based upon that harassment.

But what we should have are laws that make it illegal for an employer/supervisor to harass any employee, or to create a hostile work environment for any reason. I've had jackass employers who made sexually inappropriate comments at me. But I've also had a lot of employers who just scream and are miserable, sadistic, unreasonable people - wholly apart from any gender or racial bias.

In other words, we haven't come far at all. We need laws to protect women, of course. But we need laws to protect wages (we're still earning a fraction of what men earn), and laws to protect all workers. We need laws guaranteeing a right to continued employment absent provable wrongdoing by an employee amounting to the level of a crime. No more "at-will" nonsense. We need a $15 minimum wage for any employee over 18.

There are a lot of men who are pigs, without doubt. But there are a whole lot of employer/s­upervisors­, male and female, who are abusive and arbitrary in denying their employees the right to be treated as human beings. We could change that, and we could change those laws. But we need to get money out of politics, and we need politicians who represent the working people.

That's really it. Get politicians who take an oath to represent the working people. Screw the corporations, they don't vote. Represent the people who work for a living, pay the taxes, and pay the salaries of the politicians.

I feel like whoever - the character who wandered the streets in the night looking for an honest person. But I'm looking for an honest politician.

[ReasonIsMyReligion]

Huzzah.

[mommadona]

First rule of thumb about romance in the workplace

DON'T.

There, hope that helps.

[CaveatMagnusFrater]

I truly appreciate your well thought out rejoinders and in depth analysis. What rule should one follow in the real world? Rule #1 does not apply to thinking adults. It only seems to apply to those who think they have the moral authority to tell others how to live their lives.

mike

[ReasonIsMyReligion]

Romance and harassment are the same in your experience?