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Sunday Without Bill

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The news could not be going better. A spate of books, the latest by certified Bush fan-boy Bob Woodward, establish as fact all that we knew or feared about the Iraq War in 2003. The GOP is caught up in major influence peddling and sex scandals, man-boy sex at that.

So why was this mornings serving of political blather not satisfying? A good clue is that last week's was so very satisfying.

The problems are that there is no spokesperson for the Democrats with any charisma at all and that the Democrats are attempting a rope-a-dope strategy, mincing their words lest they be perceived as weak on terrorism.

We need Bill Clinton to take time out from his world tour as Bono to hit the campaign trail for Democratic candidates. Last Sunday morning it all came together as he lambasted Chris Wallace for asking, "why didn't you do more to catch Osama bin Laden?" This week we had John Murtha, who is a convincing ex-marine, but is more like a tired football coach than an inspiring figure. We had Chris Dodd, who is okay, but dull and stilted. We had Sherrod Brown, who does not have enough sense to answer the question when his slimy debating opponent has said five times, "answer the question" Jesus. Sure they are better than Rahm Emanuel, who gives his house speeches with his nose buried in the text in a manner that would flunk you in middle school public speaking, or Harry Reid, but we need the big Kahuna. We need to bring in a big bat at the trading deadline, just like the Yankees always do.

The objection is that he would energize the Red State base. But, he would also energize everyone else and could be a Democratic counter-part to the attention getting Bush daily tough guy speeches. Clinton is smart, forceful and more or less right on the issues, but you know that. He was elected President twice and we have not elected anyone since. In the recent New Yorker profile, Clinton says he wishes he were answering Bush, but "you have to bloom where you are planted." Time for a transplant.

Gore ran from Clinton in 2000 and Clinton was underutilized in 2002 and 2004, yet he is our greatest asset. If not now, when?

And about the rope-a dope. Democrats are not going to win by pussyfooting around the war. We need our most forceful spokesperson speaking forcefully that there has to be an exit strategy, there has to be a new team in control and that the only way that these things can possibly happen is by electing a Democratic Congress.

Our ideas are correct, but our people are stiffs. We need Bill. Then in a month he can resume his good works and alpha male lifestyle.