03/11/2008 09:30 pm ET Updated May 25, 2011

Dear Barack: Congrats on Wyoming and Mississippi!

Dear Barack,

Congrats on Wyoming and Mississippi! I knew those Cheney connections would pay off.

I also knew that a gazillion people were going to advise you to "go negative." As your designated unpaid advisor, I implore you to "go judo." By which I mean: use only Clinton's own tactics and words against her. People want to see that you can get tough -- because God knows the right-wing hate machine is going to bring the house. But do so in a way that taps into the misgivings people already have about the Clintons -- their towering sense of entitlement and their no-holds-barred lust for power.

You've started to do this with your response to their condescending VP offer. But you haven't gone far enough...

"So you guys have probably heard by now that Senator Clinton has generously offered to make me her running mate. I guess she doesn't mind a call for change, as long as it's at the bottom of the ticket. I'm still trying to figure out how someone who has the support of fewer delegates and voters figures she's entitled to the party nomination. Where I come from, that's George W. Bush math.

But that's the whole problem we've got in Washington today. There's this entrenched set of politicians who feel they're entitled to power. It's hard for them to imagine that someone who hasn't spent decades palling around with the power brokers and lobbyists might have the temerity to run for president.

And it's even harder for them to imagine that the American people might embrace such a candidate, that the voters are, in fact, sick and tired of a government mired in partisan bickering, of politicians who place electability above solving the problems of those who elected them.

So we can just imagine what happens when a guy like me crashes the party. But we don't have to imagine, do we? We've seen it all over the past two weeks. A healthy dose of fear mongering. A dash of racial innuendo. And plenty of false civility. Whatever it takes to win.

Well, I've got some bad news for Senators Clinton and McCain. After eight years of George W. Bush, the American people have had their fill of cronyism and attack ads. They are asking -- pleading really -- for the chance to see the spirit of our nation renewed. You can throw mud on that dream, but you can't make it go away."

Yours in the Fierce Urgency of Ow,