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Steven Weber

Steven Weber

Posted: May 7, 2010 05:13 PM

Ka-ching of Ka-chings

What's Your Reaction:

For all the godification in our culture, you'd think there'd be more examples of folks in high places leading peace-loving, selfless, humble, pious lives; that those who so loudly profess to be god-fearing, decent, moral Americans, wear Old Glory lapel pins, who bow their heads and close their eyes in supplication during televised National Prayer Breakfasts, who cite Jesus Christ as their favorite philosopher and decry "atheism" and "socialism" as scourges upon an already embattled Judeo-Christian landscape would, you know, practice what they screech.

And maybe they kinda are. Take the environmentally conscious BP.

Fishermen (you know -- like those guys from Galilee) who live and work in the region, which has been severely impacted by the hemorrhaging of millions of gallons of oil, killing fish, ruining habitats, spoiling coastline, destroying livelihoods and lives, are being offered money to clean up the spill and sign wavers to absolve BP from any potential liability should any of said fisherman become ill or incapacitated from exposure to the toxic chemicals permeating their once pristine environs.

BP. Doing God's work.

Or take that diva of the devout, Sarah Palin.

When she's not attending churches which perform exorcisms or wagging her French manicured index finger at all the heathens who don't practice abstinence, she rushes around shoveling speaking fees into her Fendi, covering still mysterious tracks within her own less-than-abstinent charges, basically siding with the kinds of folks Jesus took to task that day he turned their tables over. Talk about a market crash.

And then there are those crusty crusaders, those puncturers of political perfidy, the Tea Baggers.

Coming together in the face of the apparent dismantling of the sacred American principles they hold so dearly, namely that white guys should be president, big companies should make the rules for the rest of us, no one should have to pay taxes for things like roads, police and fire protection, libraries, health care, care for our elderly, education, the military and other commie/socialist, fascist stuff like that, they have made it their mission to set the infidels straight, to reclaim their rightful, snug places as citizen/consumers, trusting the banks and insurers to do the right thing with their diminished earnings and dampened aspirations.

Examples abound in all parts of the world of pious people parading their faith while betraying banal brutality, from "healing" the desperately devoted to tithing congregations to starvation, to evicting the poor from "holy" land to embracing death in exchange for eternal life.

As they thump their Bibles and Korans and rail against immorality, they sin like sinning, rather than redemption, is their business.

Because the truth is that the depths of their compassion is far outstripped by the depths of their pockets. Every dollar they amass is a graven image of the all-powerful, immutable creator of their world, a novena passed from the hands of the reverent, terrorized masses straight into their church elders' coffers. God hears their prayers, alright.

Every time a cash register ka-chings.

 

Follow Steven Weber on Twitter: www.twitter.com/@TheStevenWeber

 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
SirReal1
04:38 PM on 05/10/2010
And right on cue, Sister Sarah opens her yap and out falls some more "absurd proclamations" about "God's place" in our Government.

Sarah, the perfect example of not "practicing what she screeches"!
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10:12 PM on 05/10/2010
I wonder who'll she'll pick as her Secretary of Witch Doctoring?
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
TRex86
Enjoying life in West Ohio
08:30 AM on 05/10/2010
Having read all of Kam's tracts I'm underwhelmed. the convolutions are hard to follow. The smug tone is irritating. The "all liberals hate Christianity" meme is Republican propaganda. The Catholic church endorses social justice; many Protestant clerics have demonstrated (and been jailed) for peace, civil rights, etc. It was clever of the Rethugs to assume the cloak of phony religiosity. It sure fooled some gullible Christians. Mr or Ms Kam, I suggest a dose of Bart Ehrman. Take a look at the historical roots of Christianity, the competing early views of Christ, and ultimately the political resolution of these controversies. You are captive of arbitrary medieval decisions based on corrupt texts (if you care). Then again, it's easier to get your religion on Fox News.
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10:11 PM on 05/10/2010
Well said.
It also always amazes me that fundamentalist christians now expect their religious leaders to explain science to them, and reject the actual work of scientists outright. And what scientific writings do they obtain their "scientific" creationist alternative beliefs from? Why, the Bible of course. It's all right there, all six thousand years of the entire universe's history.
To the credit of the Catholic church, they now even accept evolution as the method by which god (assuming a god was involved) created life on this planet. That's a smart move if you want to maintain any credibility with an increasingly more scientifically astute membership.
I tried to warn a christian friend, who wished to convince me the Grand Canyon was carved by Noah's flood, that continuing to attempt shoehorning Biblical metaphors into scientific reality is going to cost them in the long run.
After all, if you're proven full of it on the age of the Earth, the Garden Of Eden, Noah's flood, Jonah and the Whale and so on, why should I believe anything else you say?
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
TRex86
Enjoying life in West Ohio
08:29 PM on 05/11/2010
In many ways science's roots are in Greek (pagan) culture. The Epicureans were positivists, believing that mankind could and should discover the secrets of the physical universe. Unfortunately, Christianity got in the way during the Middle Ages--especially later on during the Inquisition. Religious texts are at best imperfect in that they require humans to interpret the words. When words are taken as absolute, "revealed" truth they can become the enemy of scientific inquiry. Moreover, they represent the views of the interpreter du jour.

At least in this realm the Catholics finally got it right. As we have a separation of church and state so we should protect science from religious dogma. Not to say that science lacks moral implications, but there's a difference between dismissing geology in favor of the Great Flood and questioning the morality of paaying young women to collect their eggs for experimentation.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Pjbf
12:17 PM on 05/09/2010
“Jesus died for somebody’s sins
but not mine.†—P. Smith
11:44 PM on 05/08/2010
yo, Stevie...Still no word yet on that Wings' thing, huh?.... Those residuals must ready to run out soon, bro, you're gonna need a new lifeline soon, buddy! You getting any new scripts thrown your way?....
11:39 PM on 05/08/2010
I'm still betting that a huge number of so-called conservative voters are sick of the lies from so many of their leaders, and would listen to truth if it were just presented with extreme tact.
11:18 PM on 05/08/2010
I think it's called "selective belief"
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
kjohney
trust me... I'm liberal.
09:01 PM on 05/08/2010
Everytime it goes "ka-ching" an angel gets it's wings.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
kjohney
trust me... I'm liberal.
10:03 AM on 05/09/2010
I mean "its" wings.
05:56 PM on 05/08/2010
And let's not forget the patron saint of liberals, respected by all regardless of human failure. Martin Luther King, adulterer.
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08:56 PM on 05/08/2010
and this is a reminder that rethugs will let no good idea or cause get in the way of an ad hominem attack.
Pssst. By the way, MLK preached that we arent perfect as well.
06:52 AM on 05/09/2010
Pssst. Weber brought up Sarah Palin. Is that an ad hominem attack? Weber is a hateful individual, has no trouble with his rants about anyone he disagrees with.
And by the way, read my full post. There's this in my post-----respected by all regardless of human failure.------------ I have respect for MLK.
My point was that if they're conservative with human failings, and are believers, they're hypocrites, and worse. And to McGuffin below, I don't cast stones. I've sinned, too.
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McGuffin18
The best lack all conviction...
10:52 PM on 05/08/2010
Let he who is without sin....

Ladies and Gentlemen we have a winner!
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
KingKrub
04:49 PM on 05/08/2010
Spot-on as always, Steven.
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SeenItBefore
Ya want to super size that?
04:33 PM on 05/08/2010
Dam Steven, tell us what you really think.

Thank you for another articulate and well thought piece of prose.

Organized religions are a curious collection of myopic, sad sack 'fraidy cats with ill will to others as a guiding mantra... curious, to me anyway.
02:38 PM on 05/08/2010
Very cogent observations. Although, I think that there some who profess to be christian who really are. My father was quite active in his church, he was both a deacon and an elder, his faith formed his political ideology. He was a socialist. He believed that his faith led him to care for the planet, and for his fellow man. Wealth was not a priority in his life. I am not a christian, I encountered too many hypocrites in the "established" churches. I am a socialist. I came to these beliefs because of the example of my father.
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Social Construct
Go left, young man.
12:04 AM on 05/10/2010
Excellent post. I, too, am a socialist. Well, what can be termed as a market socialist, i.e., believing that well regulated private ownership and equally well regulated open markets offer more opportunity to citizens. But I digress.
Your post was spot on; too many see religious belief as either all evil or all good, whereas, most believers fall in the vast area in between and are mostly of good will. My argument would be that religion must be kept separated, and insulated, from government as, I believe, our founders intended. Otherwise, as history shows repeatedly, the extremists, of either side of the debate, gain power and influence where none should be had. We are not a religious nation, we are a nation where a free exercise of religion exists. Government must never dictate religion, and religion should never dictate government, period. This is the only example I can think of where a doctrine of 'separate but equal' does serve a common good.
12:06 PM on 05/08/2010
One quote from the Bible that you never hear the Christianists use: "Give up everything you own and follow me". Hypocrisy is one thing, but these folks are able to completely disconnect from Jesus' teachings and only use Biblical references that support the way they want to live. If Jesus were to return, there is no doubt in my mind that the Christianists would be the ones to kill him this time.

BTW, a little hat tip to blogger Russel King who refers to Caribou Barbie as Bible Spice.
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Miss Mamselle Hepzibah
08:47 AM on 05/08/2010
as always, mr weber, perfection. the sad (ok, one of the sads) part is that youre just preaching to the choir. alas.

mmh
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Denis Higgins
06:07 AM on 05/08/2010
To me,'prayer' is just another term for 'wishful thinking'...but whether singularly or in the collective sense, its power is arguably undeniable..is it not?
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Bongborg
Assimilated by the bong long
06:36 AM on 05/08/2010
Denis, to those who cannot reason, everything is arguable, nothing is undeniable, and wishful thinking is reality.

Largely, especially to the Holy Rollers who pray out loud loudly, prayer is actually the sound they make which is an analog of cattle mooing and lowing. It lets the other cattle know they are there.
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Denis Higgins
07:11 AM on 05/10/2010
It's funny you said that,BB...I often confuse chattel with cattle,myself!
04:26 AM on 05/08/2010
I can deal with grifters stealing in the name of the Lord, although I pity the poor sheep they fleece.

More significant threat are the "true believers" who create influence public policy/ legislation.

1) Of course they discount global warning. For them the Earth is 6,000 yo. old and God is in charge of taking care of their planet anyway. Doing anything about the situation would be thwarting God's plan.

2)God somehow handpicked the stretch of 3,000 miles between 2 oceans (aka USA) as the land of imminent domain Of course it is OK to wage war against middle eastern countries. Christianity vs. Islam. God is on our side.

3) End of days is impending (yipee, I'm part of the saved) so any disaster must be an affirmation of the apocolypse.

Many with these beliefs hold positions of power and influence. Stealing money seems trivial compared to the damage that can be inflicted by the "true believers". Of course (and this is the best part) is you disagree with them then you are a heretic doomed to eternal damnation.