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Sue Peters

Sue Peters

Posted: December 23, 2010 06:35 PM

Out-of-work D.C. Schools Chancellor Michelle Rhee has just created her own new education reform organization. You can, too!

How to Create a Faux Grassroots Education Reform Organization in 12 Easy Steps!

  1. Think of a name using these words: STAND, KIDS, STUDENTS, FIRST, ALLIANCE, EDUCATION, ED, OUR, SCHOOLS, COALITION, COMMUNITY, VOTERS, REVOLUTION, REFORM, NOW
  2. Put two or three of those words together in any order (possibly linked by a preposition like "with," "of," "for," or -- if you want to be really with it -- use "4″ instead of "for"!).
  3. Add an exclamation mark at the end!
  4. Create a slick website -- be sure to include engaging photos of multiracial kids on your front page.
  5. Write a fierce and positive mission statement that no one can disagree with, like: "We want all kids to achieve excellence in school!" Or, "We want an excellent teacher in every excellent classroom teaching excellence to excellent kids in excellent schools!" Or "We don't want any child left behind by mean, terrible teachers and left with no option in life but prison."
  6. Invite a forgotten or disgraced politician looking for a good vehicle to resuscitate his/her flagging political career to be on your Board of Directors.
  7. Fill up the remaining spots on your Board using the Ed Reform Mix-n-Match List of reusable people already on other ed reform boards. It's quick, it's easy, and they will be happy to do it! (Plus, it makes them feel relevant and important.)
  8. Ask for money. This is the easiest part of all. Just pick up the phone and dial 1-800-BROAD or 1-800-B&MGATES. Operators standing by!
  9. Create the illusion of grassroots parent support by also asking for money from ordinary citizens. Then you can claim you have a "membership" and can list the names of all your members in the thank you section alongside the Broad, Gates, Walton and Fisher families (that will make your ordinary members feel special!) in the glossy, four-color, Annual Report you create using the money you have collected.
  10. Ask your BFF funders to commission push polls and surveys that produce data that support your agenda.
  11. Write press releases using this made-up data and send them to the media (remember to include your contact info).
  12. Sit back and wait for the media (hopefully, Oprah) to call you to ask you all about education reform because you are now an expert on education! Congratulations!

This handy-dandy guide originally appeared on Seattle Education 2010.

 
 
 
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Jose Vilson
10:25 AM on 12/27/2010
I tried this already. I wasn't Trust-Fundy enough.

In all seriousness, this is an excellent peek into a framework provided by all types of pundits, lately education. Plenty of politicians did it right after 9/11 to address security, for instance. Thanks for bringing it up so concisely. Now, how we disentangle these plans is up to us.
04:20 PM on 12/25/2010
You left out the part about getting some wall streeters involved for the plunder.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Joel Shatzky
09:40 AM on 12/24/2010
Well done, Sue! But don't forget that "No Excellent Child Will Be Left Behind If He/She Can Race to the Top." If you haven't seen my take on how to start a charter school, check out this link to "The Charter Starters" on You Tube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lnrrw5CV3Gw It's had over 1400 hits and I hope some of the teachers--and parents--in Seattle will see it. George Bernard Shaw, who was a great social satirist once said: "A jest is an earnest in the womb of time." What I hope will finally happen to make the people who are really concerned with education and not "robocation" unite is a national teach-in that will focus on what the "educational deformers" are doing. I hope to know your thoughts on this in a comment.
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03:32 AM on 12/24/2010
people need to discover their personal responsibility.
03:29 AM on 12/24/2010
Super, Sue! You've said it all. Satire is the best weapon. Keep it coming.

theschoolprincipal@inthetrencheswithschoolreform.com
www.inthetrencheswithschoolreform.com
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mlaiuppa
Pres. Sarcasm Society. Like we need your approval.
03:14 AM on 12/24/2010
LOL.

SanDiegans4GreatSchools.
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bayonet division
Choose this day whom you will serve.
02:24 AM on 12/24/2010
Some do, some mock.
DavidBCohen
Teacher, blogger: http://accomplishedcaliforniatea
09:59 PM on 01/01/2011
Thank goodness! The mockery is brilliant and the people "doing" are mostly doing "to" us rather than "for" us.
09:30 AM on 01/03/2011
Some do and mock.
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teacher39years
Educational Reformers need to be "Reformed."
10:45 PM on 12/23/2010
Great Article. That just about sums things up.