11/01/2007 01:29 pm ET Updated May 25, 2011

The Body Person

As my longtime readers know, I rarely comment on what right-wing blogs do. They're witting tools of the Republican smear machines, they just make shit up. So I ignore them.

But occasionally something comes along that's so outrageous, I have to say something.

The wack job who writes (I use the term loosely) over at Atlas Shrugged is doing her best to pump new life into the "Hillary is a lesbian" rumor, using this dumb quote from the Village Voice's Michael Musto as her foundation:

As I recently said on MONICA CROWLEY's radio show, whisper campaigns are claiming that HILLARY CLINTON is GAYLE KING-ing her aide de camp, the glamorous HUMA ABEDIN, an Indian/Pakistani goddess from Kalamazoo, Michigan. In other words, Hillary may be putting Huma out there in the press and purposely making her more visible as a pre-emptive strike that amounts to her hiding in plain sight. This way, no Republican can later say, "Who is this gorgeous babe who spends so much intimate time with Hillary that the Observer called her Hill's 'body person'?

Well, I just had to laugh. Having just come off a stint as a campaign staffer, I happen to know what a "body person" is. It's someone who travels everywhere with the candidate. The job description is to take business cards, handle followup thank yous, keep the press out of the candidate's face, etc. - basically, the all-around non-strategic staffer. They work 18-hour days, and they're picked on the basis of 1) appearance and 2) how well the candidate gets along with them, since they spend so much time together.

So Musto is a moron, and the rest of the people who ran with the innuendo are morons, too. I especially like how this hack writes, "And if anyone would know, wouldn't it be the king - er, queen - of the Village Voice."

Yeah, because we've never known a gay person with overactive gaydar. Right.

The wack job even links to a picture of Huma Abedin "trailing" Clinton. Hey, dipshit - that's what the body person is supposed to do! It's in the job description!

"Intimate time." "Body person." What a bunch of panty-sniffing creeps these people are.