I am so happy to shed light on what fellow conservatives feel about gun control! Obviously, it's no good. I mean, why not give guns to kids? Congressman Matt Salmon thinks maybe that's a good idea. And Congressman Huelscamp makes sure his 11-year-old son is a gun owner. So smart....

Former Senator Rick Santorum blames gay marriage on a TV show. Can you guess which one? Cancelled TV show Will & Grace! For those of you shakin' your heads not knowing what show that is, let me inform you.

Will & Grace was a popular TV show that started...

Donald Trump and Sarah Palin and Marco Rubio, oh my! CPAC, always showin' off the pride and joy of America. I was honored to attend such a sacred event. I had to make my accent less apparent because people are only used to the lame stream media Yankees askin' them questions. I am so happy to have found real patriots.

George Washington and the Tea Party Patriots graced my presence. Who knew GW was even alive? Lucky me! But you know, it always comes back to those gays. Did you know, they've stolen the word gay??!!

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Happy Sequester Month! It's about time we talk about this sequester thing. But, what is it? It's confusin' to all of America... and that's Obama's plan. No one really knows what cuts are goin' to be made, we just know we're cuttin'. I'd normally like this but my GOP family...

It was the sip heard round the world! At least it took some of the attention off of Obama. Boy was that a long speech... was anyone really listening? And who really believes in climate change? Check out what some Americans think about the SOTU, POTUS and the GOP Jesus...

I'm just glad it's over. This was Obama's last inauguration and it was a doozy for this GOPer. I was thrilled to find some fellow conservatives though. Real thinkers who are lookin' out for the country. There were some crazies but of course, that's to be expected at a liberal...

We're comin' awful close to that cliff! Craziness could ensue soon. But maybe it's not so bad... maybe there will be somethin' awesome at the bottom of this cliff! With Christmas comin', it's goin' to be an eventful couple weeks!

I am still tryin' to recover from the sad election results. But I've managed to finally get out of bed and get back to doin' what I do best... reportin' on breakin' news! And since it's Thanksgiving, I figured I would review the true facts (like every good conservative does)...

Looks like the GOP is ready to save America from the liberals! No need for tax returns and certainly no need to spend time talkin' about abortion. Just keep your legs closed...that goes for men and women. Until you're married. And then you can schedule it accordin' to Jesus.

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I figured I would do my part for America and create a binder full of women for Mitt! It makes perfect sense that he would have these binders. In fact, he has 2 sets. One for hirin' the women and one for marryin' the women. Too bad most women in...

Mitt Romney pulled through! He was such a good Republican candidate...smilin' and lyin' like a Bush. He made us conservatives proud. I can't wait to watch the next one and look forward to keepin' score again. There's so much excitement in the air... who will gaffe next, Biden or Romney?...

Lesbians, and liberals, and Clinton, oh my! What a week! I spent time in the belly of the beast: Charlotte, NC for the DNC. I have to admit, they put on a good show. And maybe they were a little patriotic. We'll see what happens come November!

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That was quite a week! There were speeches, balloons, elephants and Newt Gingrich. Despite the heat, people just couldn't get all that hot about Mitt.

Along with Stephen Baldwin, James Carville and many more, check out what those folks are talkin' about. See you next week at the DNC... those...

My ode to my hero, the conservative star, Stephen Colbert! Since I'm headed to Tampa for the RNC convention, I figured I would see if he was available. A girl can try, can't she? We'll be surrounded by the great Mitt Romney, Paul Ryan, and so many more. I hear...

That is one good lookin' VP! I, along with my most patriotic Americans, are excited about Paul Ryan for VP. Medicare schmedicare... I'm not old so I don't have to worry about it. And those old people are passin' on soon anyway so nothin' to worry about there either.
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Boy was there some excitement over at Chick Fil A! The gays were protestin' and the Christians were eatin.' I still think the answer to all our problems is marri-aje but it seems I'll have to keep workin' on that one.

People are still torn as to who they're...

I sat down with the liberal immigrant, Cenk Uygur from "The Young Turks," and discussed some of the recent issues facin' our country. We had never met and don't see eye to eye on much but he did love my marry-age (pronounce it with a french accent!) idea. There's hope...

Last week was quite a doozy! I know how disappointed we all were to see that Obamacare was approved as Constitutional. I mean, the GOP is just tryin' to help with population control! We're lookin' out for the world. Besides, I think Roberts was just kiddin.' Maybe he's testin' us......

My fellow conservatives were meetin' in Las Vegas, so I headed over to the City of Sin to say hello, and see if I could help with convertin' some sinners. And since Obama had just made an immigrant declaration, I thought I'd see what my comrades had to say. I...

Little ol' me decided to head on over to that liberal conference in Rhode Island, Netroots Nation. I can't say too much about their politics but I have to admit they were nice. Deep down they're just confused, I'm sure of it. I mean, who really believes in science? And...