I now understand that we mirror each other back and forth. All issues others may have with me or my opinions are about them. I'm mirroring something unbalanced in them, and the brighter my light shines the stronger I will mirror them back. How it all feels in me? That's my stuff to handle.
Maybe the real issue with learning how to reinvent oneself is the simple fact we really don't know how we formed our identity in the first place.
It's taken me 30 of my 49 years to realize that not being who I am is more deadly, and it has taken the last 19 years to try to make a practice of this. What this means, in a daily way, is that I have to be conscientious about being truthful and resist the urge to accommodate my truth away.