We might think that admitting fault is weak or that it lets the other person off the hook for his or her faults. But actually, it takes a strong person to admit fault and it puts us in a stronger position with others.

While it is extremely difficult to admit when we make mistakes, honesty and humility are what make for a sincere apology.

If it's true that "everything someone does or says is an attempt to meet a need," what needs do judgment and blame serve?

Think of someone you feel wronged by: can you find a case against that person in your mind? What's it feel like to go into that case? What does it cost you? And others?

Choosing to whine and blame is a choice just as much as choosing to do something about your circumstances, but one is more likely to produce a meaningful result than the other.