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Between slurping his soup, then stuffing his face with fish and rice, he continues to elaborate in agonizing detail about how two years ago, he'd married a girl thirty years younger and how she took him to the cleaners. "The bitch took me for every dime -- she took everything!"
The morning after our first date, I received a follow-up text from my suitor: "That was the best $20 I've spent on a date, ever. You should write about it." And so I did.