If you don't like feminism, don't call yourself a feminist. But I have a hunch that when your brilliant little girl grows up and voices her desire to be president you are not going to tell her she should instead look for a man to open her jars -- you may even encourage her to call herself a feminist.
I wish there were another catch-all word like "feminist" that I could use to express my belief that all people -- male, female, transgender and otherwise -- should have the exact same fundamental rights and opportunities in this world we share. "Gender-equalist," perhaps? "Advocate for gender fairness"?
Recently, on one of my long walks, I asked myself, "What if we started from scratch and redefined 'health and wellness' in a way that is fad-proof and could withstand the test of time without dictating regular changes in diet, exercise and outfits? What would that look like?" Then a friend sent me a link to Ms. Fit.
Once I knew I was not going back to Saginaw, not finding a man to marry, not going to have children, not going to collect all of the things that people told me were an important part of life, were in fact the very things in life that bring happiness, once I rejected all of these things, the real work begins.
I've come to recognize that there is a political dimension to my domestic choices and my work. If men don't decide to be more involved around the house and with childcare, and more candid discussing these decisions, then the gender dynamic in our culture that sees women as primarily responsible for children or affected by having a family will never change.