If HIV-negative men were more assertive about their status, they could take on a fairer share of responsibility in regard to HIV prevention. HIV-positive men have their own status to manage. It's not their responsibility to manage yours too, but it seems that they're expected to do so.

I don't support marriage equality simply for other people. I want to walk down the aisle one day. But in the community in which I live, Palm Springs, Calif., I find that there is an immense shortage of single, available, poz-friendly, sober-friendly total tops.

HIV disclosure laws vary from state to state, with Iowa having arguably the strictest. But let's face it: You're going to have sex again, no matter what lawmakers say. You're going to have to do an honest examination of your personal ethics as an HIV-positive individual.

People with HIV are not walking public health threats, despite how the law treats us. We are human beings and we are far more than the virus we carry. Laws based on ignorance, fear and shaming of people with HIV are the real danger to public health.

The danger of the "third-date rule" is that it allows for feelings to develop, albeit little baby ones. Disclosing your status once a semblance of trust has formed is like placing a loaded gun in front of a person and asking them not to shoot you with it. I prefer to avoid the firing range.