How to be Your Own Mediator: A Relationship Goal is Necessary for Aim
As a mediator, I often ask the parties individually and collectively about their relationship goals.
As a mediator, I often ask the parties individually and collectively about their relationship goals.
Grande Lum | Posted 09.07.2009 | Living
When you can distance yourself from your response, you separate the reaction from yourself.
Grande Lum | Posted 09.01.2009 | Living
Unlike a comedian who has to setup a punch line carefully and wait for the right beat, you can come back to an issue that happened hours, weeks and even years ago to work things out.
Grande Lum | Posted 08.13.2009 | Living
In conflict, two people can view identity as a zero sum game. The more right you are; the more wrong I am. You can sense this mentality creeping into stories we tell ourselves and other people.
Grande Lum | Posted 08.07.2009 | Living
Catch the ways you leave out the other person's perspective. Alter your actions by altering the stories you tell yourself and others.
Grande Lum | Posted 08.06.2009 | Living
Feeling forced to choose to be assertive or empathetic is natural. Yet you may actually feel mixed and even desire to both assert and empathize.
Grande Lum | Posted 08.01.2009 | Living
Identify your contribution to the conflict. By accepting your part and then taking responsibility, you give yourself the best chance possible for getting out of conflict.
Grande Lum | Posted 08.01.2009 | Living
If you truly want to bridge the gap between you and the person across from you, sitting alongside is still the place to start.
Grande Lum | Posted 07.30.2009 | Living
See yourself doing well. Separate that from what the other person has done or will do. Picture success as it relates to you, your body language, volume, tone and words.
Grande Lum | Posted 07.20.2009 | Living
If the the person your butting heads with is feeling safe, they are less likely to lose it.
Lita Smith-Mines | Posted 07.10.2009 | Business
If you receive flowers once the transaction ends, it means the deal certainly shortened your life expectancy. Don't skip your next doctor's appointment.
Grande Lum | Posted 05.25.2009 | Living
Remember that another person has a positive intention.
Grande Lum | Posted 04.10.2009 | Living
In conflict, heroism may be hidden. Recognize the noble goal that is holed up behind demands and defensiveness to find a constructive way out. Act in ways that live up to heroic ideals.
Prevention | Kalee Thompson | Posted 09.21.2008 | Living
Originally published at Prevention.com Life is an endless series of negotiations, small and large. Getting a great deal on a new car, talking your ...
Grande Lum | Posted 10.20.2009 | Living