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Jenny From the Blog

You Know You Went To Sleepaway Camp In The '80s If...

Jenny Isenman | Posted 06.24.2014 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

You have a clear understanding of the four food groups: cereal, Popsicles, bug juice and s'mores.

4 Ways Family Road Trips Have Changed Since Gen Xers Were Kids

Jenny Isenman | Posted 07.06.2014 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

Wow, were our games complex. There was I Spy, Make the Trucker Honk His Horn, The License Plate Game, GHOST, Mad Libs, those Yes & Know invisible ink pads, and the saddest game of all: the Wave Game.

11 Cringeworthy Secrets Our Kids Have Shared

Jenny Isenman | Posted 04.27.2014 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

Yep, these are the types of things my sweet little imps (and yours) have volunteered during carpools, sleepovers and playdates. Be careful what you tell them and who you let them talk to.

What Kids Today Can Learn From Gen-Xers About Sick Days

Jenny Isenman | Posted 04.01.2014 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

Follow these simple rules and you'll be wrongfully staying home from school in no time. That's right, you CAN fool us, or at the very least make us proud trying.

I Miss the Smell of Snow -- a Florida Transplant Gets a Bit Nostalgic

Jenny Isenman | Posted 03.19.2014 | Miami
Jenny Isenman

I think we're all aware that life in South Florida has its perks. Our kids can play outdoors all year-round. We could do Bikram yoga outdoors, 10 mont...

Did You Suffer From Theme Park Dementia This Winter Break?

Jenny Isenman | Posted 03.12.2014 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

There are no rules in Disney about what you can and cannot say, but I'm gonna guess if there were some set of commandments -- screaming "Mickey's dead?" in a crowded line would be get you sent to some jail-land where the guards have oversized heads and the bars are soft yet, non-penetrable.

A Jewish Mom's Letter to Santa

Jenny Isenman | Posted 02.17.2014 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

I'm sure the fact that we don't believe in you has something to do with your snubbing us year after year. Do we, a people known to produce a whiner or two, complain? No, some of us, myself included, have made an effort to believe.

A Night In The Life Of A Mom Who Has Just Discovered Her Child May Have Lice

Jenny Isenman | Posted 01.23.2014 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

Knowing nothing about lice and not having time to look up any facts, I decided that the most efficient way to tackle this plague was to do all the cleaning, washing, vacuuming and nitpicking simultaneously -- or one lousy louse could start the whole cycle again.

Why You Should Totally Get to Second Base With Yourself

Jenny Isenman | Posted 01.23.2014 | Women
Jenny Isenman

I'd heard horrible tales of the mammogram and it's crushing pain. I feared the impending torture and dreaded that what little my child bearing and breastfeeding had left unscathed would be permanently altered.

40 Signs That You Are Definitely A Parent

Jenny Isenman | Posted 12.12.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

After writing about the secret language of moms, it dawned on me that there are so many unique qualities that we share as parents -- and they literally set us apart from every other life force on Earth.

25 Parenting Phrases We Swore We'd Never Say

Jenny Isenman | Posted 01.23.2014 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

There was a certain language they spoke, that cliché "parentese," that I swore would never pass my lips.

18 Totally Random Things I Only Know Because I'm a Gen Xer

Jenny Isenman | Posted 11.12.2013 | Women
Jenny Isenman

I wouldn't know a ton of things about pop culture, big hair or bad TV had I not been a poster child for Generation X.

30 Reasons Moms Are Late

Jenny Isenman | Posted 09.11.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

I'm not gonna sit here and tell you that I was always a punctual person, but becoming a parent has put a whole new spin on my excuses for being late to meetings, lunch dates, parties and appointments.

20 Things Moms Say And What They REALLY Mean

Jenny Isenman | Posted 08.11.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

Ah, "Momisms"; those phrases we turn to get a short reprieve, to conceal criticism, to maintain our sanity or simply because we have no clue what our child just said and we're trying to go with it.

Date Night Before Kids vs. Date Night After

Jenny Isenman | Posted 06.02.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

We still adore our men, but our alone time has little resemblance to the hot dates we once had. Wow, did we take those nights for granted! Want proof? Behold: Date Night Before Kids vs. Date Night After Kids.

What To Do When Your Tween Boy Wants To Hold Your Hand

Jenny Isenman | Posted 04.27.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

The other day, my son looked at me with those same wide eyes that once asked, "Mommy, when I'm older will you marry me?" and asked, "Mom, I'm getting older, doesn't that mean I should start wearing Hollister?"

What Those Conversation Hearts SHOULD Say After Marriage and Children ...

Jenny Isenman | Posted 04.14.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

I've had some awkward V-Day Moments, from my 5-year-old trying to soap opera kiss me to my hubby trying to stuff himself and champagne into an undersized NYC bathtub in our undersized NYC apartment. I've decided this year will not be awkward.

Should Parents Need a License to Procreate?

Jenny Isenman | Posted 04.07.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

You're also required to pass a test to drive a car, sell a house or be a lifeguard. You can take a class to learn how to give birth, but once that baby's out, you're on your own.

Top 10 Resolutions Anyone Can Keep

Jenny Isenman | Posted 03.02.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

I'm so tired of looking back at the resolutions of the past year and realizing they lasted no longer than a week, which is why this year, I've decided to make a list that's way less ambitious.

Does Humor Have Any Place in Tragedy?

Jenny Isenman | Posted 02.17.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

I thought about not writing anything humorous until we could all come to grips with this injustice (So, essentially, never). But, I will and I hope other humorists do too.

Popular Beauty Myths, Debunked

Jenny Isenman | Posted 02.06.2013 | Women
Jenny Isenman

Do you get zits from unwashed pillowcases or cellphones? Will you age the way your parents age? Do retinoids make you more susceptible to sun damage or sunburn?

Brown-Eyed Brunettes Aren't Gonna Take it Anymore -- Watch out, Blondies

Jenny Isenman | Posted 02.05.2013 | Comedy
Jenny Isenman

Us brown-eyed brunettes are tired of getting short-changed... Let's rise up against those chipper blue-eyed blondes -- I'll make the signs!

The Best 'Quickie' Stretch for Moms

Jenny Isenman | Posted 01.27.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

Frankly, I'm getting tired of reaching around in the car to grab a drink/toy/video game from one of my children, only to find I've pulled out my back/shoulder/neck.

15 Tips to Help Moms Survive in the Suburbs

Jenny Isenman | Posted 01.20.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

Nearly a decade ago, I moved to the suburbs from NYC. In that time I've learned some pretty important things to ensure my survival, nay, my sanity.

Glum to Glam Mom Makeover

Jenny Isenman | Posted 01.13.2013 | Parents
Jenny Isenman

Listen, I've given up many things since becoming a mom: perky boobs, solo trips to the restroom, an enormous amount of hair (I had no idea how much hair I would lose after pregnancies)... but the one thing I refuse to give up is being glam.