I think it's the obligation of gay people to say that whether Manti's actions were the result of extreme sexual naiveté or an attempt to mask his lack of pro athlete hyper-heterosexual, these are patterns that are common in our community.
Yes, she came out in a bigger way than ever before, but at the same time this was about her, not our community. It was her way of doing it, not ours. The award she accepted was for her career achievements, not for our community.
What I got was a woman who realizes that professionally she has achieved it all. There are no more mountains to climb unless she really, really wants to scale another show biz Everest. And she might. Or not.
Yes, she has a right to come out as she wishes, but she also has it in her to be bigger than that, to contribute what she knows about loneliness and hurt to benefit kids who don't have the love of friends and family, and she chose this awards show, this platform, to obfuscate once again.
What seems to draw many gay people to celebrity culture is the skill that both gays and celebrities must cultivate to navigate between privacy and disclosure under the watchful eye of strangers. And if there's one thing LGBT people should agree on, it's the importance of compassion.
Ms. Foster's speech was one given by a whole, complex human being -- a mother, a co-parent, an ex-wife, a daughter, a caregiver, a middle-aged adult -- not a one-dimensional poster child for any particular community. If people expected that from her, then that's their problem, not hers.
A lot of people will say that it was up to her when and where to come out, and they're absolutely right, but that still doesn't mean she wasn't a coward, and it doesn't change the fact that she could have helped millions of people by coming out years ago.
Whatever you thought of last night, you'd have to agree that it was another indication of how it's becoming harder and harder for anyone in public life to have any real credibility and still be living in the closet.