How we treat others should be a choice that reflects our character -- not a reaction to other people's character. So, I choose to be kind because my kindness will define me. Not my parents. Not my relationships. Not my sexuality. Not my work. But my kindness.
There comes a point when we must decide what our endgame is going to be, personally and for the planet. To me, the only one that makes any sense is love. It's how we have to define ourselves beyond all other criteria. This will ensure the health and abundance for all.