Our gay husbands or lesbian wives loved us, yes, but they also felt pressured to follow the one-man/one-woman definition of marriage endorsed by society and, for many, their faith communities. Ultimately, most of our marriages ended in divorce.
We often think of the effects of these elections in terms of whether or not marriage equality will expand to another state. What we don't consider (but we ought to) is the toll that these referendums can take on LGB people during the election season itself.
We have an alternative apocalyptic view of the world. The world really is ending -- but it's not ending in a wave of brimstone and fiery flows of lava; it's the end of ignorance, prejudice, hate and intolerance. And there will be a new heaven and a new earth.
Sanctity-of-marriage groups couldn't care less about the obnoxious frivolity with which many heterosexuals regard their sacred institution. Why not propose a constitutional amendment to ban divorce? Why not try to make adultery illegal?
It's time for this "we need to protect marriage" con to die. And it will. It could happen in North Carolina or Minnesota. Both states are facing anti-marriage-equality votes next year. Or it could happen before then.
The equality drumbeat has rumbled on with news that Kentucky, Michigan, Ohio and Texas will be attempting to re-examine their amendments banning same-sex marriage and civil unions.