Back when you were in your teens or early 20s, you probably didn't date all that much. In an environment like high school or college, you were surrounded by men and women who were single and young just like you were. When you found someone, you hung out and really got to know each other before you fell in love and chose to marry.
I recently had a client I'll call Sandy, who loved a man named Jeff. Yet they had broken up at least three times during the two and a half years they'd been together. While apart, an intense longing for the other would occur and they'd come back together celebrating a harmonious honeymoon truce with a lot of love and a lot of sex. But it wouldn't take long for the problems to reappear.