We realized that we would be the first same-sex couple in North Carolina to get this far. We did not know that we would be the first in the entire South. There has been a lot of speculation about why we put ourselves out there so publicly, knowing what would likely follow. Here is the reason.
This week the Democratic Party will make history by becoming the first major American political party to endorse both marriage and employment equality for LGBT people. That this position will be ratified in Charlotte, N.C., highlights a dilemma that is both political and moral in nature.
In many people's minds, I'm a straight man making a documentary film about a gay issue; if I want people to pledge their hard-earned dollars to my film in an economy that doesn't leave a lot of room for donations, I owe them an answer. I'm happy to oblige.
After more than 25 years together, we need to be where our relationship is honored and respected, where we can enjoy the same rights and responsibilities of any other family. And we need to be where the heart of this movement beats: Iowa.
In the wake of Amendment One, you should feel proud, and perhaps a feeling of pride is easy to understand. In spite of the outcome, we can't forget the fact that hundreds of thousands of North Carolinians stood up for equality and justice.
While I understand that this is a natural response to the passage of such a discriminatory act, one that targets innocent North Carolinians for the worst of reasons, misunderstanding and bigotry, I'm asking everyone to take a deep breath.
Why single out North Carolina, which is only one of 31 states that now have constitutional amendments prohibiting same-sex marriage? Most importantly, how would such a movement help to change the hearts and minds of the Tar Heels who voted in favor of Amendment 1?