It's been hard to keep this one under wraps but I'm about to embark on an exciting new chapter in my career and wanted to share it with my HuffPost family first and foremost before our official announcement tomorrow.

In general, I'd say having instant access to people's random thoughts is creepy and weird. With Twitter and Facebook you get instant access to all sort of useless information, for free. What's better than that? Absolutely nothing. What's worse? Absolutely nothing.

Split up to look for somebody. If you got separated from the group you deserve to die.

Last time around, words like Hope and Change beat Maverick and Joe the Plumber. This time I want jokes.

It's not Cook's fault he's rich. We made him that way. He is behaving exactly how he should. He's normal. We are the crazy ones. You can't potty train an old dog after you've let him crap all over the house for 10 years.

The end of the year is often a time we use to reflect and tally our successes and failures. Most of us do this late at night on bended knee with our head in a toilet after having drunk way too much on New Year's Eve.

The one thing that seems clear is this -- there's no such thing as a sacred cow when all cows are sacred. When you speak or write, no matter how careful you are there is a chance someone is going to be offended.