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People Pleasing

5 Ways to Let Go of Perfectionism and Still Excel at Anything

Vee Somphon | Posted 06.24.2014 | Healthy Living
Vee Somphon

You don't have to play team sports to know that winning is the biggest high, and if you love chasing after it, some experts might call that an addiction. That addiction has a name, and its name is perfectionism.

3 Personality Traits That Stress You Out!

John Tsilimparis | Posted 04.14.2014 | Healthy Living
John Tsilimparis

Why do we worry so much? Despite it being time consuming and exhausting, it's still another issue of control that we struggle to let go of. We essentially worry because we have convinced ourselves that if we worry enough about something, bad things won't happen to us and we will be safer in the world. But, in truth, it has the potential to make us feel more distressed.

Free Yourself by Being Direct

Joyce Marter | Posted 03.01.2014 | Healthy Living
Joyce Marter

I'm a recovering people pleaser. Like many people (especially women), I was raised to be "nice" and put others' needs before my own. In my 20s, I too...

From Fearful People-Pleasing to Loving Presence

New Harbinger | Posted 02.15.2014 | Healthy Living
New Harbinger

To me, loving presence means being connected to our inner nature of love and allowing it to radiate out to others. Knowing and experiencing our loving presence is one important outcome of mindfulness practice that can help us gain freedom from fearful people pleasing.

Those Who Mind: The Case Against Trying to Win People Over

Kathryn Lamble | Posted 01.23.2014 | Healthy Living
Kathryn Lamble

It's hard work changing yourself to suit every situation. It's hard work over thinking everything you say to make sure it's just right, and it's hard work having your only validation come from the reactions and approval of others.

Brave

Natalie Thomas | Posted 01.23.2014 | Parents
Natalie Thomas

I'm the one that jumps first and freaks later. But speaking my mind? Finally fessing up to all that was wrong in my life, being a voice for those who hadn't, wouldn't or couldn't? Now that was terrifying.

Halloween is over, but are we still wearing our masks?

Aly Walansky | Posted 01.23.2014 | Women
Aly Walansky

I don't want to stop pleasing people -- I don't want to stop being a good person and showing all the love I have to give. But I am learning to be responsible for my own happiness first, and everyone else, second.

The Price We Pay When We Want to Be Liked by Everyone

An Bourmanne | Posted 12.22.2013 | Healthy Living
An Bourmanne

Living their dream and abandoning yours is exhausting, unfulfilling and such a pity. You are so much more than you give yourself credit for. There's no need to hide what makes you YOU. We need your one-of-a-kind brilliance.

What's At The Core Of My Strong Compulsion To Be Liked?

Robin Hoffman | Posted 12.22.2013 | Fifty
Robin Hoffman

I remember my mom saying that I treated my friends better than my family. Immediately, I knew it was true. My family was stuck with me, warts and all, or so I thought back then.

10 Beliefs That Undercut Your Happiness

Paula Davis-Laack | Posted 09.17.2013 | Healthy Living
Paula Davis-Laack

These deeply-held beliefs and faulty assumptions prevent us from putting ourselves out there and taking risks, strategies that happy people rely on to succeed. They also prevent us from having those tough conversations, whether with ourselves or with important people in our lives.

Confessions of a Former People-Pleaser

Shira Hirschman Weiss | Posted 07.05.2013 | Healthy Living
Shira Hirschman Weiss

I couldn't move on from the loose ends I created, and continually frayed the bottom of my pants -- in my mind. No actual pants were harmed for this bl...

If Everybody Likes You, You Are Doing It Wrong

Ben Michaelis, Ph.D. | Posted 06.22.2013 | Healthy Living
Ben Michaelis, Ph.D.

If about 85 percent of the people you meet like you, you are probably doing something right. In contrast, if much more than 85 percent of the people you meet like you, you are probably doing too much to get along.

5 Reasons To Always Follow Through

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. | Posted 03.23.2013 | Healthy Living
Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

Before I get into the importance of keeping your word, let's explore some of the reasons for not doing this. If you are a person who doesn't do what you say you will do, what is behind this behavior?

How To Master The Art Of Saying 'No'

Kathryn Lamble | Posted 01.08.2013 | Healthy Living
Kathryn Lamble

No! It's a pretty scary word, right? It certainly is for me. It's like a well-placed "boo!" bursting through the darkness from an unseen corner. In fact, I find "no" so scary that that I often have difficulty saying it, and that's just where my problem begins.

Are You A People-Pleaser? A Healthier Approach To Friendships

Kathryn Lamble | Posted 12.18.2012 | Healthy Living
Kathryn Lamble

Trying to solve your crappy self-worth through outside approval is a race you're always going to be running at half-speed. When the outside approval dies down, that's the discomfort you have to sit with. That's the "you" you have to learn to love.

When To Stop Being A Hero

Laura Berman Fortgang | Posted 11.23.2012 | Healthy Living
Laura Berman Fortgang

Now, it's perfectly normal to gain recognition and satisfaction from being the only one who can solve a particular problem, but when the joy of the recognition quickly fades into resentment, stress or overwhelm, sorry -- you've become the hero at a great cost.

At 2, He Couldn't Speak, But He Could Read and Haggle

Dafna Maor | Posted 10.06.2012 | Parents
Dafna Maor

Tal has come a long way since he was 2. He's learned a lot, but so have I.

Your Child's Autism Cures You From Trying to Please Everyone

Dafna Maor | Posted 09.08.2012 | Parents
Dafna Maor

Working in a media outlet doesn't necessarily guarantee that you are surrounded by people with high communication skills and knowledge of the human psyche.

Are You a Giving Person?

Roya R. Rad, MA, PsyD | Posted 12.25.2011 | Healthy Living
Roya R. Rad, MA, PsyD

To be a stable giver, it is important to have boundaries, emotional honesty and emotional responsibility.

Nice Doesn't Mean Reducing Your Worth

Daylle Deanna Schwartz | Posted 09.07.2011 | Women
Daylle Deanna Schwartz

Stores have markdown sales in order to move inventory or get rid of products that aren't selling. It's good business sense to do it at appropriate times. But the practice is self-defeating if you reduce your own value.

Do You Hate Your Body?

Colleen Perry | Posted 11.17.2011 | Healthy Living
Colleen Perry

For the many of us, saying "no" means risking the discontent, anger, or judgment of others. We learned to say "yes" to avoid the guilt or negative consequence of saying "no."