"There's no need to run home to my brother and make it bigger than it is," Teresa says in her interview. Note how she says "my brother" and not "her husband." Teresa still feels like she has ownership over Joe, and she views Melissa as her replacement and mortal enemy.

As Teresa speaks, Caroline dusts off her infamous head tilt, which is often followed by other signature gestures, such as "wild arms" and "terrifying low voice of death." As Teresa stumbles through her side of the story, Caroline rocks out all her moves.

"I'm willing to go talk to your sister," Caroline says selflessly. Then, Joe offers Caroline the same advise that I'd offer to you, my dear readers, as we embark on this Season 5 journey together: "Wear some armor and bring a hand gun."

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Teresa's head on a platter is the only suitable meal. In some cultures, brain is a delicacy. It's a shame she hasn't got one. Teresa knows why everyone's annoyed, but she hopes a meal can smooth things over.

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