Yet, great loss can unseat the controller, which we often scramble to resurrect by getting busy, blaming others, blaming ourselves, or trying to fix things. Even so, if we are willing to let there be a gap, if we can live in presence without controlling, healing becomes possible.

I was eager to step into a weekend devoted to assisting others in developing the tools that have become an invaluable part of my own softened existence. Up until a couple of years ago, the idea of self-care felt nebulous and foreign to me.

I was 10 years old when the moon first beckoned to me. The call came in the guise of a homework assignment. Miss Lusk, my much-loved fourth grade teacher, told us one propitious day to go home and compose a poem.

I've begun using the most extraordinary and simple phrase. It is giving me great peace and a sense of empowerment. It is simply, "I don't want to."

The first step in achieving anything is defining your vision. As a start, begin with this powerful question: "What do I want?" It's easy to skip over...

We must cultivate a state of radical forgiveness to experience true intimacy.

There is absolutely no way around the law that it takes two healthy, joyful, whole people to make one healthy, joyful, whole relationship.