The key to an erotic endeavor post-pregnancy is taking your time. Some mothers may feel traumatized by the experience of having been, quite literally, split wide open. The prospect of allowing anything -- small or large -- to enter the vaginal area can seem more than daunting.
Fact: Parents of youngsters don't have enough sex. Who could blame us? Between that baby or breast pump dangling from your boob, the sleep deprivation and the tedious conversations about bowel movements, there's nary room for sexytime. We get it.
Between hormones, physical discomfort after birth and a complete upheaval of your daily routine, it's perfectly normal to feel resentful of a partner who gets to walk about pain-free without breastmilk-stained shirts or a child clinging to his body.
Before we had a kid we didn't need date nights to have an adult conversation or a meal that lasted more than five minutes. But now, date nights have become a necessity and suddenly, we are back to the pressure of having to carry on a witty conversation, put on cute underwear and have sex.
One of the reasons I started my blog was to vent about how my son's existence was forcing me to alter my own, and to show the world that despite having those alterations, having kids doesn't mean you need to change everything.
I may be the mother of your children, but I am not your mother. Even if sometimes I feel as if I am acting like your mom, or sometimes if you feel as if I am acting like your mom, we all know that I am really not your mom.
"Our sexuality becomes so deeply and misguidedly tied up in our looks that we cannot feel sexual until we feel we look good. To be powerful sexual beings, we need to be able to separate our desire from what society dictates to be 'desirable.'"
While also unleashing all the shades of relationship gray that are inexplicably tangled up in the mix when dealing with sex issues -- frustration, confusion, awkwardness, anger, tenderness, tear-inducing panic and yes, love.
Last week we said goodbye to our kids for the next seven weeks. They will have freedom, independence and fun at sleepaway camp. Excitedly, they wait all year to go. They LOVE sleepaway camp. I am miserable. And I feel like a horrible wife.