As a sexual addiction and intimacy disorders specialist, I am often asked about the frequency of sex. Couples want to know what is "healthy." Usually, they're afraid they're either having way too much sex or not nearly enough.
Sexual addiction is not defined by either sexual offending (as Ariel Castro would have us believe) or having a high sexual desire (as a recent study would have us believe). Instead, sexual addiction is about escape and dissociation from life.
Many men who have sex with men aren't gay or even bisexual. Although their mental and emotional state resembles that of the initial stages of coming out, gay and bisexual men go on to develop a gay or a bisexual identity, whereas these men don't.
Ultimately, the Fifty Shades phenomenon is opening up a very healthy dialogue about female sexuality, not just in the therapeutic community and among BFFs on their coffee breaks, but between women who've read the books and their intimate partners.
Chad has eliminated all online traces possible of his former self. I would be surprised if he hasn't already signed to write at least one book with a Christian publisher in the evergreen "He was lost to the sin of sexual addiction, but now he's found genre.
In my work with my clients, I've often wondered why some people jump right in to learning and growing and take off with it, while others seem to keep getting stuck. I've discovered that harboring a shameful secret is one of the reasons.
While it is true that sexual behaviors get labeled as sexual addiction when they are not, and that sexual addiction may not be the best label for out-of-control sexual behavior, the fact remains that those suffering with out-of-control sexual behavior do exist.
One of the roots of sex addiction is an inability to cope with trauma and shame, feelings that LGBT people may struggle with as a community more so than their non-LGBT counterparts. However, gay sex addiction is no different from straight sex addiction.