Labels work great when you're writing a book, giving a presentation or explaining to others who you are. But the truth is that these labels are limiting and only box people in, restricting what they are and can become.
As a sexual addiction and intimacy disorders specialist, I am often asked about the frequency of sex. Couples want to know what is "healthy." Usually, they're afraid they're either having way too much sex or not nearly enough.
At 18, I stuffed my natural attraction to women down into my soul and chose to date men, all because a shrink had said that anyone who was homosexual couldn't possibly be normal, because who would "choose" such a difficult life?
Within the context of discrimination, one of the most used "weapons" of those against equality is the notion that people "choose" to have a homosexual orientation. It is important to challenge this myth, because it forms a key part of opposition to equal rights for gay and lesbian people.
Why do women have orgasms? Most of the time, I'm so occupied with answering questions about why some women don't have orgasms that I rarely stop to think about why women do have orgasms. It's a good question, really.
If we count people who are in the closet or "discordant," then sure, that boosts our numbers, but to what end? Why do we need to know how many of us there are? Is the implication that if there are more of us, then we are more deserving of rights?
Dr. Gary Gates has reported that 50 percent of people who identify as lesbian, gay or bisexual identify as bisexual. He's also reported that 3.5 percent of the U.S. adult population identifies as LGB. Detractors seem to feel that the latter percentage is too low and the former too high.
I worry about the slippery slope of social science research that too often treats gender and sexuality as static phenomenon, and young people as doomed to a fate only an adult can devise for them, or save them from.