It's not always clear to patients what to ask a potential psychotherapist and how to know if he or she is any good. It's also hard to know if it's working. Most people find it easier to assess the skill of a medical practitioner.
In technical terms my thoughts about Dr. K and his car were bits of transference -- feelings related to other important figures in my life that I transferred onto him. This transferential moment could have been an important opening, enabling this therapy to get off the ground.
Pamela Milam was on to something that could spark water cooler discussion and since April is Counseling Awareness Month, now is the perfect time to talk about a few things counselors might be noticing in their couples counseling sessions.
Quite often, when we contemplate major change, major evolution in our lives, the reaction we get from our dear ones is a combination of an attempt at support, combined with fear that can manifest as undermining, judging us or lashing out.
The benefits of therapy are nice "work" if you can get it. The effort to figure out your conflicts and motivations on a comfortable couch in a nicely-decorated office with one other person, rather than unloading on your loved ones and friends, may be well worth the effort.
Providing therapy in the home can be a rewarding and valuable experience, building wonderful relationships between families and therapists that can last for years. Just remember to establish rules from the start and get everyone involved.
There's nothing more humbling than finding you're living out a big flaming cliché, although it (of course) feels like you are the first person to have this experience in all of history. Five years ago, my coming-out cliché hit me like a ton of rubyfruit. I fell in love with my lady therapist.