By constantly editing (instant "untag," anyone?) and embellishing, we only permit this idealized version of ourselves to rise to the surface, be seen and accepted. What we actually end up feeding is our fear that we aren't good enough exactly as we are.

We know that the emotional center of the brain is a primary decision maker for us throughout the moments of the day. Emotional experiences (especially difficult ones); influence our snap judgments that form our perceptions and actions.

It can feel unsafe and vulnerable to receive compliments and take them to heart. If we quickly return the energy, we can stay in our comfort zone and we obstruct the intimate and heart-opening growth before us.

They are keeping you from loving yourself unconditionally. They are a crutch that keeps you hobbling through your dating life. They are the thick, wool coat that insulates you from being left out in the cold.

With honesty comes the security to trust each other. In turn, trust allows us to enter the state of vulnerability that creates intimate space in a romantic relationship. Somewhere deep inside of all of us, we cherish this connection.

How's that for a rich lesson? In real life, flexibility is synonymous with playfulness and open-mindedness. In the words of George Bernard Shaw, "We don't stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing." Sounds a lot like rigidity, if you ask me.

Whether grieving the loss of our own life, or another's, we each have the capacity to see past the veils of separation. If our hearts are willing, grieving becomes the gateway to loving awareness, the entry into our own awakened nature.

Writing is just one manifestation of this tension, this nagging, lifelong struggle to be you or be perfect -- to live a messy, real, vulnerable life, or an edited one. In writing, you get to arrange things just so, like a museum curator piecing together the perfect exhibit.

In October of last year, I was no longer able to deny a long-developing internal shift, and promptly left my rather high-powered career to figure out what my next passion was. Walking out of the office that day with no real plan, I'd never been more scared. Now, I've never been more liberated.

Richie had truly "seen" Sharon -- her vulnerability and spirit, and he'd expressed his care by mirroring her goodness. It took another year and a half for her to tell him what those gifts had meant to her, and to apologize. But because he hadn't given up on her, a thaw had begun.

Far from being a vulnerable trait, if used wisely, a humble attitude clears the way for one to fully appreciate more of life.

I learned that this struggle to break from a routine -- to find passion in what you do, to find your voice -- is something we all go through. There is something reassuring, beautiful even, in how human this is.

You can't control anybody -- all you can do is speak your truth and hope for the best. For you to be healthy and happy, to have a chance at getting what you want, you have to put yourself out there without the slightest idea of what will happen.

The good news is that you can create a psychological turnaround and increase your ability to cope effectively during a crisis if you work through your challenges with the help of others. One of the most important things you can do is to communicate your feelings to someone.