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Widower

Do You Have to Be Reasonable When You're Grieving?

Megan Devine | Posted 07.17.2014 | Healthy Living
Megan Devine

I could pretend, but that pretending cost me. I could be reasonable, but telling that lie was exhausting. Now, when I read about grief, when I attend conferences that talk about grief, I think about those early days. I think about being reasonable. I think of how ridiculous that is.

'Til Death Do Us Not Part: 5 Ways to Stay Connected to Your Deceased Spouse

Ashley Davis Bush, LCSW | Posted 07.15.2014 | Healthy Living
Ashley Davis Bush, LCSW

You will likely always long for their physical presence, but recognizing that you still have a relationship is one way to soothe the sorrow. Staying connected fortifies you so that you can engage with life, connect to the living, and make meaning out of your loss.

This Ad Beautifully Illustrates Just How Heroic Single Parents Really Are

The Huffington Post | Taryn Hillin | Posted 06.20.2014 | Divorce

Being a single parent is by far one of the toughest jobs on the planet. But all too often, single moms and dads go unnoticed for their tremendous sacr...

How To Find Peace On Father's Day When Dad Is No Longer Around

Carole Brody Fleet | Posted 06.09.2014 | Fifty
Carole Brody Fleet

Father's Day, 2001. A day that did not start out well. A day on which I had never felt more or completely alone. You see, by the time Father's Day 2001 arrived, I had been widowed for all of five months. As if that were not enough, my own father died two weeks prior to Father's Day.

Widowhood With a Message

Gramma Good | Posted 06.03.2014 | Fifty
Gramma Good

Live with peace surrounding you. Keep your treasures within eye distance. Arrange a "room of your own."

Why So Many People Go Sideways When Death Visits A Family

Carole Brody Fleet | Posted 06.02.2014 | Fifty
Carole Brody Fleet

There is another arena where 'armchair quarterbacks' also exist -- except this time, those who sit in the metaphorical armchairs have the ability and occasionally, the actual desire to wreak havoc, cause pain and outright destroy relationships.

What Is Absolutely Okay To Do After Becoming Widowed

Carole Brody Fleet | Posted 07.12.2014 | Fifty
Carole Brody Fleet

The following is a partial list of what it is absolutely, positively OK for you to do after becoming widowed.

Who Needs to Learn the Lessons Of Grief?

Megan Devine | Posted 07.05.2014 | Healthy Living
Megan Devine

There might be lessons here, about trusting your own heart, leaning into the places you are deeply broken. There might be places to explore, ways to find out if any of your deep self remains, given what you have endured. So learn, yes. Study your own heart, yes.

Why Even Some Experts Get It Wrong When It Comes To Grief

Carole Brody Fleet | Posted 07.05.2014 | Fifty
Carole Brody Fleet

It should come as no surprise that I receive my fair share of invitations to grief workshops, grief conferences, grief seminars and so forth. One such recent invitation included a description of a grief workshop that kind of -- well, horrified me.

One Widower's Poignant Advice To Married Couples

Eric W. | Posted 07.02.2014 | Weddings
Eric W.

Since my original plan didn't work out, I'd like to make one more request: As soon as you see your husband or your wife, stop whatever you're doing, take them in your arms, hum your song, and dance.

Why 'Getting Over It' Is A Myth You Should Ignore

Carole Brody Fleet | Posted 06.28.2014 | Fifty
Carole Brody Fleet

I had been widowed just over a year and well into my own Healing Journey when my mother gave me some very wise advice (which I both follow and dole out to this day). She told me to stop and look back at how far I had progressed since that awful season in time when my husband passed away. When I actually took the time to stop and examine how far I had progressed to that point (and have progressed since that time many years ago), I started worrying less about being "over it" and started appreciating the healing that I had accomplished instead.

'Shouldn't You Be Over That by Now?' How to Respond to Judgment on Your Grieving Process

Megan Devine | Posted 06.15.2014 | Healthy Living
Megan Devine

Sometimes it just makes it easier on you, easier on your heart and mind, if you simply stop trying to explain. Refusing to explain or defend your grief doesn't mean you let other people go on and on about it, continually telling you how you should live.

Are You Grieving 'Right'? What's Right, What's 'Wrong'... And WTF?

Carole Brody Fleet | Posted 06.14.2014 | Fifty
Carole Brody Fleet

I have always taken great umbrage at anyone criticizing, questioning or opining on how the widowed handle their grief and their highly individual and intensely personal healing journeys. Unfortunately, there seems to be a lot of it going on.

The One Thing You Should Never Ever Say To The Widowed

Carole Brody Fleet | Posted 05.31.2014 | Fifty
Carole Brody Fleet

As defined by virtually every dictionary in every language, "ex" means former. The death of a spouse or partner does not nullify a marriage or relationship -- that sort of nullification involves a divorce or a breakup. I assure you that when it comes to widowhood, no one left the marriage willingly

The Real Difference Between Death And Divorce

Carole Brody Fleet | Posted 05.24.2014 | Fifty
Carole Brody Fleet

Be it biblical or folk; fictional or popular, history in all of its forms has certainly had its share of classic struggles and conflicts: David vs. Goliath; the Hatfields vs. McCoys; Billie Jean King vs. Bobby Riggs; Ginger vs. MaryAnn; the Dallas Cowboys vs. Just About Any Other Team In The NFL and of course, My Hair vs. Humidity. Today, we look at yet another epic 'struggle' and conflict with which countless have taken serious issue.

A Letter to People in Pain: The Early Days of Grief Are a World of Their Own

Megan Devine | Posted 05.12.2014 | Healthy Living
Megan Devine

If you're here, in the early days, and the universe has just split open and everything has changed, I'm sorry you're here. Others have come before you, but that doesn't really matter now.

Healthy Grieving

Ashley Davis Bush, LCSW | Posted 05.05.2014 | Healthy Living
Ashley Davis Bush, LCSW

When someone you love leaves the planet, you are no longer quite the same person. Wishing to return to your old self is an exercise in defeat. Instead, recognize that you are growing into a new self. This new self will integrate love, loss and change. Life is always about change and integration.

Grief and Healing: Will I Ever Recover?

Megan Devine | Posted 04.23.2014 | Healthy Living
Megan Devine

For me, any outside source or force asking me when I'll get better is going to be met with irritation. But if I do the asking, if I wonder -- myself -- what healing or recovery might look like, then it becomes a very different question.

'I Was Dragged Kicking And Screaming Into The Wonder That Has Become Social Media'

Carole Brody Fleet | Posted 04.19.2014 | Fifty
Carole Brody Fleet

I confess... I am a blonde-haired, green-eyed, modern-day dinosaur.

Have You Heard You're Not Alone in Your Grief? It Isn't Really True

Megan Devine | Posted 04.05.2014 | Healthy Living
Megan Devine

You alone carry the knowledge of how your grief lives in you. You alone know all the filaments of life and of love that fly through you. You alone know how deeply your life is now changed. You alone have to face this, inside your own heart.

Why Celebrating Every Birthday Is So Important

Carole Brody Fleet | Posted 04.05.2014 | Fifty
Carole Brody Fleet

In earlier years and like so many of you, I fondly remember the goal of getting to the 'next number' on the ladder of life. I remember being ten years old and wanting oh-so-much to be twelve years old because twelve meant the 'sophistication' of junior high school.

On Being A 29-Year-Old Widow

Elizabeth Scarboro | Posted 04.02.2014 | Weddings
Elizabeth Scarboro

Wednesday morning, 7 a.m., the radio alarm blaring. Keep your eyes closed. Don't move, because you have miraculously woken up in your old life.

The Important Things We Need To Know About Grief

Megan Devine | Posted 03.25.2014 | Healthy Living
Megan Devine

We need to develop some skillful means both to witness grief, and to live in grief. We need to learn how to support rather than to solve. We need to practice being in there with grief, rather than getting out of it. And we need to hear the distinction between the two.

A Sentence No Parent Should Ever Hear

Eric W. | Posted 03.24.2014 | Healthy Living
Eric W.

A woman from the hospital asked me if I had any friends or family that they could call for me. I shook my head yes. They asked me for the number. I handed them my phone and pointed to my parents in the contact list.

Making Promises: What Does a Wedding Ring Represent?

Eric W. | Posted 03.19.2014 | Weddings
Eric W.

She was my fiancée, not my wife. I am widowed, but never married.