Tamar Chansky, Ph.D. is a psychologist and anxiety therapist committed to making the mind a safer place to live for children, teens and adults. Her most recent book, Freeing Yourself from Anxiety: Four Simple Steps to Overcome Worry and Create the Life You Want was released in January, 2012 from DaCapo. She is also the author of the Freeing Your Child series. These books include: Freeing Your Child from Negative Thinking: Powerful, Practical Strategies to Build a Lifetime of Resilience, Flexibility and Happiness and Freeing Your Child from Anxiety and Freeing Your Child from Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder.
Trying to sell the benefits of imperfection is never easy. It's especially hard when it comes to the idea of love. Turn on your television, open a magazine and be dazzled by the parade of perfection right before your eyes: the perfect date, the perfect engagement, the perfect wedding, the...
January is a complicated month. At first blush, it's like new love. There's that wonderful, wind-beneath-your-wings feeling, that promise of a fresh start, a whole new you, an open door to the possibility that everything will be different (perfect) this time. But faster than you can say, "I'm going to...
When tragedy strikes, our hearts are broken and we grieve for the families who are reeling from loss. Though we find ourselves overwhelmed with emotion and feeling ill-equipped to process these incomprehensible events ourselves, let alone convey them to our children, we, as parents are in a unique position to...
Ah, how magical to celebrate the holidays with family. Oh, wait... really? With... family? @&%#!, with family?!
You don't have to guess who's coming to dinner. You know the cast of characters well: It's the uncle who embarrassed you when you were 5, 10, 20, and counting, the sister who...
The clock is ticking toward Thanksgiving and the holidays beyond, and two very different feelings are flashing on your emotional news feed: impending joy and impending doom.
OK, maybe doom is overstating it; dread may be closer to the mark. But let's face it, many of us are finding ourselves...
One day last year I was pulling into the parking lot at the bank. A woman was backing out and drove right into the car behind her, seemingly unaware of the possibility that another car might be there. It was odd. I was incredulous. What's wrong with that person? I...
There was a time back in the early days of my now nearly 30-year marriage when a hand-written sign hung over our toilet. It read as follows: "Please remember to put the seat down or [cover your ears, kids] I may be forced to kill you." Yikes. If memory serves,...
Now that summer has drawn to a close, people of all stripes are getting that sinking feeling... The party's over and the cold, harsh reality of real life is upon us. Wait, cold harsh reality? Are we living in the Depression-era dustbowl in John Steinbeck's Grapes of Wrath -- or...
Summer is quickly drawing to a close and as you gather your back to school supplies, don't forget to equip your child with some good tips for making it a great, anxiety-free transition (for both of you). Here are a few ideas to get you started.
Ever notice how aggravated you get when you go to check out at the grocery store, and... there's a line? And what about how even more aggravated you feel when you realize that you're standing in the wrong line, especially after you've done the exhaustive -- customers x coupons x...
I have a confession to make. I lost my cool this morning. Not really visibly unless you count the look I gave the poor workman who actually did the right thing in showing up on time, and in so doing just happened to be blocking the driveway with a huge...
I want it! I need it! I have to have it! If I don't, I'm gonna... Thank goodness people can't hear what we're saying in our heads, because no matter whether the "it" we are waiting for is -- to hear back from a first date, job interview, a store...
Are you an apology-phobic? Telltale sign: You shrank your wife's favorite cashmere sweater in the wash (though, yes -- for the record, you were trying to help with the laundry) and didn't notice her new haircut (because to you, your wife always looks gorgeous), but when she brings these facts...
Quick question. What would happen if in some Star Trek/Dr. Who plot come true, we all, as a civilization, woke up one morning and the neural circuits of perfectionism -- the ones that have us tearing our hair out every time things don't turn out precisely to the "t" how...
There's a certain type of worry that is like no other. That's the kind where we, as parents, are worrying about our children. You can't concentrate; you can't enjoy yourself; you can't sleep. There's a pit in your stomach because in the back of your mind you know: All is...
When I was a college student back in the early 1980's we had a rather unflattering pre-exam period tradition. We all gathered on the front lawn of the school just as night fell and engaged in what is best described as a group-wail. Something like a cross between a primal...
"Bing-bing-bing!" What was that? That's the sound your brain makes when the "finishing things" circuits light up with excitement because you really, actually, finally completed something. It's like an internal hooray. Well, newsflash, that part of your brain just left you a note -- it says it's been feeling a...
"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!" There are a few more no's in the exact quote, but essentially, this is what the hippie in the movie Hair says when, in prison, he is being forced to get his hair cut. Take away the hippie's hair, and...
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