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The Bachelorette Week Four Recap: Olympic Heartache!

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This week's episode was sponsored by the Canadian Board of Tourism, in conjunction with the 2010 Olympic Games. The bachelors all packed up and left the house in LA to visit Jillian's hometown of Vancouver. (Yes, when she was on The Bachelor 6 months ago, her hometown was Peace River, Alberta. But we won't get caught up in the details.) Guess what: Vancouver is home to the 2010 Winter Olympics! In case you didn't know that, it was mentioned about ten times throughout the episode. Jillian also sported a "Vancouver 2010" hoodie, in case you're more of a visual person.

But as much as she praised Vancouver's beauty, Jillian can't marry a city. Even a city that is host to the 2010 Winter Olympic Games. So, we move on to the men.

1-on-1: Kiptyn
The date began as all dates do, with the couple running toward each other in a spacious green field. They went kayaking and shared a kiss. They went to the grocery store and shared a kiss. They made dinner together and...kissed. It was actually kinda cute until Jillian ruined it with this pearl of wisdom: "Every girl's dream is to be in the kitchen, hot and flustered 'cuz she's so worried if the meal turned out right or wrong and then her guy comes and kisses her on the neck. "

I don't know, Jillian. My dream is that I burn dinner, threaten to stab myself with a carving knife and THEN my guy kisses me and makes everything better. To each her own, I guess. But seriously, Jillian and Kiptyn seem great for each other. They both volunteer with children and would totally do it more, if only they had time (which there is never enough of, when you're whoring yourself out on reality TV).

Group Date: "Curling: An internationally recognized winter Olympic sport"
This game of ice-sweeping is definitely the most exciting Olympic sport out there. The guys were split into two teams and Jesse scored the winning goal. (Is it a goal if there's no net?) But Michael was the definite winner in the cuteness category. I can't figure out if he's on some serious uppers, is an eight year old trapped in a man's body, or is just downright adorable.

The winning team got to hang out with Jillian on a boat. First, she spent some time with Jake. Jake is a good guy. And a nice guy. And he'll tell you that whenever he gets the chance. But Jillian told Jake he didn't have to be perfect all the time. This devastated the poor lad. You see, he is perfect. He's been labeled too perfect his whole life. Girls have dumped him because he's too perfect. Don't fret Jake, being aware of the problem is half the battle.

Then Jillian shared some time and saliva with Jesse. Body language analysis: she was the one to pull away from the kisses first, so no match there. But he still got the rose (for his MVP performance in the Vancouver 2010 official Olympic sport of curling).

Finally, David got to romance Jillian. After fawning over her derrière and swearing a bit, he went in for a kiss... and was shut down! Jillian felt disrespected. David thought she was playing hard to get and loved it.

2-on-1: Mark vs. Mike!
True, Jillian isn't going to end up with either of them, but that doesn't matter. All the guys predicted that Mike would get the rose. They were so sure. Almost too sure...

Mike played offensive on this date. He ran toward Jillian in an open field while Mark ambled behind. In the helicopter (We're at that point in the season where there's one per episode.) Mike held her hand in front of Mark. At dinner, Mike gave a speech about how great Jillian was, and kept interrupting Mark!

But then, Mark put it all on the line and told Jillian that he may have been cheated on once ("it was never confirmed"). This emotional leap convinced Jillian to give him the rose. She cried a lot, but explained that although Mike would take care of her, she was looking for a partner, not a clichéd husband. I was almost proud of her.

Rose Party
For some unknown reason, Jillian dressed up as a drag queen. All the guys hated on Wes. Ed called him a Country- Singing Turd; Jake called him Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde. Meanwhile Jillian went gaga over him. But then, Tanner P. told Jillian that one of the guys (we found out it was Wes-shocker) had a girlfriend back home. A distraught Jillian ended the cocktail party early.

Rose Ceremony

Jillian cried, said she felt betrayed and asked the girlfriended-guy to come clean. Cuddly little Robby swore. Even Jillian swore. Chris Harrison promised they'd get to the bottom of this! No one (ie. Wes) would confess. David told Jillian she should send home the mystery "snitch". (Close on: Tanner shifting uncomfortably) Throughout all this, Michael made some very silly faces, confirming my theory that he is, in fact, an eight year old.

Booted - David and Juan. Juan was quite gracious, David went bleep bleep bleep all the way home. The only bad guy left is Wes. I hope he lives up to the role...

Next Week's Drinking Game:
Michael does something adorable
The word serious
The phrase "not here for the right reasons"

This post was sponsored by the 2010 Vancouver Olympic Games.