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Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW
If you’re looking for guidance, support or information about divorce, please visit Moving Past Divorce. Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW has been a licensed clinical social worker and college instructor for over two decades. The topic of moving past divorce is a personal one for her – divorce goes back five generations in her family. Follow her on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn.

Entries by Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW

How To Help Your Children Live Happily In Two Homes

(1) Comments | Posted November 19, 2015 | 5:48 PM

The presumption in divorce in recent years is shared parenting. While a close to 50/50 split has been shown to be beneficial to children's well-being, some children experience stress transitioning from home to home -- especially if they witness conflict between their parents. It's important for your kids to see...

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6 Reasons Why a Rebound Relationship May Be Right For You

(0) Comments | Posted October 1, 2015 | 2:09 PM

Most experts believe people who are newly divorced probably aren't ready to jump headlong into a romantic relationship. The chance of a rebound relationship having long-term potential is slim. Truth be told, there are many reasons why it rarely ends well.

However, there are certain situations when entering...

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12 Lessons Daughters Learn From Their Parents' Divorce

(7) Comments | Posted September 11, 2015 | 1:30 PM

Women, and especially daughters of divorce, can put undue pressure on themselves to find the right partner, marry and develop a happy home life. But if they possess this goal, it can present many problems. For the most part, women from divorced homes don't have a healthy template to follow...

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10 Lessons My Divorce Taught Me About Lasting Love

(11) Comments | Posted August 14, 2015 | 4:38 PM

I've learned a lot of lessons over the last 20 years since my divorce. It dawned on me recently that even though I didn't have a divorce party (just wasn't in the mood) it doesn't mean that I can't mark the 20th anniversary of my divorce in some way. So...

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Timing Is Everything When It Comes To Marriage Counseling

(1) Comments | Posted July 14, 2015 | 10:32 PM

People often contact me looking for marriage advice. They ask me "Can my marriage be saved" or "Can you help us decide if we should stay together?" While these are complicated questions, my answer is usually something like: "Marriage counseling is hard work and there are no guarantees. But you...

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7 Reasons It May Be a Good Idea to Stay Single

(10) Comments | Posted June 4, 2015 | 10:35 PM

There's nothing wrong with seeking love, because it's beautiful and can bring about some of the most treasured moments in our lives. But very few people know how to be alone and do it well. They aren't happy to be alone. They fear it and seek love wherever they go....

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The Way Parents Fight Affects Kids' Self-Esteem (In All Kinds Of Families)

(0) Comments | Posted April 29, 2015 | 10:02 PM

Children soak up everything they see, feel, and hear. Parents may believe they are giving their children all the love they need, but they send a conflicting message when they fail to reconcile their own relationships with their former partners. There are plenty of things parents can do to protect...

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Does Taking a Break From Your Relationship Postpone the Inevitable?

(6) Comments | Posted April 3, 2015 | 11:06 AM

For some couples, it makes sense to take a break if they use the time to honestly evaluate their relationship. If a couple assesses their commitment and decides that their marriage is worth saving, a cooling off period can be an effective way to give each other some much needed...

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Will Living Together Without Marriage Damage Kids?

(1) Comments | Posted January 22, 2015 | 10:33 AM

In recent years, the rate of adults over the age of 18 getting married has sharply declined and the rate of children being born to never married parents has skyrocketed. The question that arises for many people is: What are the risks to children when their parents remain...

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Are You Crazy in Love Yet Dread Losing It?

(0) Comments | Posted January 8, 2015 | 9:33 PM

Many people fear relationship failure. Real love makes us feel vulnerable and we tend to have fear of the unknown. Putting trust in someone can make us feel exposed. Some people even believe that the more they care about someone, the more at risk they are for being hurt.


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6 Signs Your Partner Is Good Marriage Material

(3) Comments | Posted December 1, 2014 | 5:46 PM

Who we choose to marry is one of the most important and costliest decisions a person will make, yet it's not uncommon for lovers to make errors in judgment. Why does this happen? One reason is that most of us aren't raised with a healthy template of marriage to follow....

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4 Ways Creating Shared Meaning Can Improve Your Marriage

(0) Comments | Posted November 13, 2014 | 12:20 PM

Over the past several years, I've written several articles about how to improve your marriage and prevent divorce. However, it struck me recently that all of these articles were missing an essential element of a lasting marriage -- the ability to create shared meaning, a purpose, or a dream with...

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How Being Too Self-Reliant Can Destroy Your Relationship

(1) Comments | Posted November 3, 2014 | 12:42 PM

Many of us grew up hearing "The only person you can depend on is yourself." We were taught from a young age that it's not a good thing to lean on others too much and that being independent is admirable. The truth is that self-reliance is a double-edged sword. While...

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6 Reasons Why Being Friends With Your Ex Probably Won't Work

(10) Comments | Posted October 2, 2014 | 4:14 PM

As a therapist, I've spent a lot of time explaining to my divorced clients why trying to remain friends with their ex can be problematic. Let's face it, many people are not emotionally ready to move on after a breakup and believe that preserving a friendship with their ex (assuming...

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What Do Women Want From Love and Marriage?

(5) Comments | Posted September 17, 2014 | 5:07 PM

Most observers agree that marriage in the US has been changing. Over the last fifty years, there has been a quiet shift in the landscape of family life in America. Approximately 50 percent of adults over age eighteen marry; this number is compared to 72 percent in 1960, according to

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How Keeping Secrets Can Destroy a Romantic Relationship

(7) Comments | Posted August 7, 2014 | 1:41 PM

Many of my clients tell me they keep secrets from their partner because they think telling the truth will make things worse. Or they believe that their significant other simply couldn't handle the truth and that it might end the relationship.

For instance, Kerry never told Brad that she...

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10 Signs You Are at Risk for a One-Sided Romantic Relationship

(3) Comments | Posted July 24, 2014 | 1:24 PM

I hear over and over from women who e-mail or meet with me in counseling sessions: "Why do I keep picking guys who hurt me?" or "How do I learn to trust my judgment and stop wasting time with guys who aren't right for me?"

Many women consistently put other's...

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9 Warning Signs Your Relationship Is Headed For Collapse

(18) Comments | Posted July 8, 2014 | 3:57 PM

After decades of being a therapist and lover of self-help books, I've come to realize that red flags usually appear fairly early on in a relationship that can signal eventual disaster if they're not dealt with. For instance, most couples report that their relationship problems didn't surface suddenly but are...

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Is Resentment Ruining Your Marriage?

(5) Comments | Posted June 26, 2014 | 4:37 PM

There are many factors that lead to the demise of a marriage. When couples have hurt feelings, it can be a challenge to forgive and forget. Problems in a marriage such as emotional detachment and a lack of sexual intimacy seldom develop overnight. It's often said that resentment is like...

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Message to Dads: Strengthen Your Bond With Your Daughter After Divorce

(4) Comments | Posted June 13, 2014 | 4:13 PM

Father's Day is coming soon and it is a wonderful opportunity to strengthen your relationship with your daughter or heal wounds from the past. Adjusting to your changed relationship after the breakup of your marriage can present new challenges. It's best adopt a resilient mindset and let go of the...

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