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Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW
If you’re looking for guidance, support or information about divorce, please visit Moving Past Divorce. Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW has been a licensed clinical social worker and college instructor for over two decades. The topic of moving past divorce is a personal one for her – divorce goes back five generations in her family. Follow her on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn.

Entries by Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW

5 Rules For Divorced Dads To Make Dating OK For Their Kids

(0) Comments | Posted June 30, 2016 | 11:41 AM

While it's normal to seek solace, companionship, and a sexual relationship after a breakup, it's crucial to take it slow when you have kids so you can assess whether this relationship is casual or might be permanent. If you approach dating thoughtfully and consider that your children's loyalty may be...

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8 Essential Topics to Discuss With Your Partner Before Tying the Knot

(2) Comments | Posted June 2, 2016 | 6:28 PM

Being in love is a wonderful feeling but staying in love takes skill and effort. Research shows that couples who stay committed and passionate about each other are good communicators. Truth be told, no topic should be off-limits for a couple considering commitment and marriage. Engaging in meaningful...

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Living Together Versus Marriage: Benefits and Risks Over the Long Run

(2) Comments | Posted May 6, 2016 | 1:29 PM

When it comes to emotional well-being, young adults - especially women - seem to get as much of a boost from living with a partner as they do from marriage, according to data collected by Sara E. Mernitz and Clair Kamp Bush, co-authors of a recent study out of

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What's The Best Alternative To Co-Parenting When Ex's Don't Get Along?

(0) Comments | Posted April 1, 2016 | 6:11 PM

Studies show that conflict is what creates the most pain and anguish for children after parents' split, and that keeping parental disagreements to a minimum is a key aspect of helping kids become resilient. Over the last few decades, research by child development experts has demonstrated...

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Can A Marriage Thrive With Unresolved Conflict?

(4) Comments | Posted March 10, 2016 | 10:18 AM

For most of my life, I've believed the myth that good marriages are relatively free of conflict. This misconception has caused me anguish on many occasions. It's also been shared by my clients as they complain about perpetual conflict in their marriage and consider divorce as an option to marital...

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7 Ways To Get Over Your Fear of Rejection And Achieve Lasting Love

(2) Comments | Posted January 29, 2016 | 10:42 AM

For a relationship to be balanced, partners must be able to love and trust themselves first. They must feel they are needed and appreciated for support they give. If you have been let down in the past, the prospect of needing someone can be frightening. You may fear depending on...

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10 Ways to Steer Clear of Partners Who Are Wrong For You

(3) Comments | Posted January 8, 2016 | 3:51 PM

Many people who are in unhealthy relationships ask themselves "Why do I attract partners who are all wrong for me." Or, "How can I be sure to recognize destructive patterns in relationships and take steps to change them?"

Claire, a client who sought help with making better choices in romantic...

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10 Ways To Boost Your Daughter's Self-Esteem After Divorce

(4) Comments | Posted December 3, 2015 | 2:36 PM

In a culture where girls are barraged with inappropriate images of what it means to be a female, it's no wonder that bringing up girls with a healthy dose of self-esteem can be a daunting task.

Fostering your daughter's self-esteem post-divorce is a top priority because girls are so...

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How To Help Your Children Live Happily In Two Homes

(2) Comments | Posted November 19, 2015 | 4:48 PM

The presumption in divorce in recent years is shared parenting. While a close to 50/50 split has been shown to be beneficial to children's well-being, some children experience stress transitioning from home to home -- especially if they witness conflict between their parents. It's important for your kids to see...

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6 Reasons Why a Rebound Relationship May Be Right For You

(0) Comments | Posted October 1, 2015 | 1:09 PM

Most experts believe people who are newly divorced probably aren't ready to jump headlong into a romantic relationship. The chance of a rebound relationship having long-term potential is slim. Truth be told, there are many reasons why it rarely ends well.

However, there are certain situations when entering...

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12 Lessons Daughters Learn From Their Parents' Divorce

(7) Comments | Posted September 11, 2015 | 12:30 PM

Women, and especially daughters of divorce, can put undue pressure on themselves to find the right partner, marry and develop a happy home life. But if they possess this goal, it can present many problems. For the most part, women from divorced homes don't have a healthy template to follow...

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10 Lessons My Divorce Taught Me About Lasting Love

(12) Comments | Posted August 14, 2015 | 3:38 PM

I've learned a lot of lessons over the last 20 years since my divorce. It dawned on me recently that even though I didn't have a divorce party (just wasn't in the mood) it doesn't mean that I can't mark the 20th anniversary of my divorce in some way. So...

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Timing Is Everything When It Comes To Marriage Counseling

(1) Comments | Posted July 14, 2015 | 9:32 PM

People often contact me looking for marriage advice. They ask me "Can my marriage be saved" or "Can you help us decide if we should stay together?" While these are complicated questions, my answer is usually something like: "Marriage counseling is hard work and there are no guarantees. But you...

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7 Reasons It May Be a Good Idea to Stay Single

(10) Comments | Posted June 4, 2015 | 9:35 PM

There's nothing wrong with seeking love, because it's beautiful and can bring about some of the most treasured moments in our lives. But very few people know how to be alone and do it well. They aren't happy to be alone. They fear it and seek love wherever they go....

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The Way Parents Fight Affects Kids' Self-Esteem (In All Kinds Of Families)

(0) Comments | Posted April 29, 2015 | 9:02 PM

Children soak up everything they see, feel, and hear. Parents may believe they are giving their children all the love they need, but they send a conflicting message when they fail to reconcile their own relationships with their former partners. There are plenty of things parents can do to protect...

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Does Taking a Break From Your Relationship Postpone the Inevitable?

(6) Comments | Posted April 3, 2015 | 10:06 AM

For some couples, it makes sense to take a break if they use the time to honestly evaluate their relationship. If a couple assesses their commitment and decides that their marriage is worth saving, a cooling off period can be an effective way to give each other some much needed...

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Will Living Together Without Marriage Damage Kids?

(1) Comments | Posted January 22, 2015 | 9:33 AM

In recent years, the rate of adults over the age of 18 getting married has sharply declined and the rate of children being born to never married parents has skyrocketed. The question that arises for many people is: What are the risks to children when their parents remain...

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Are You Crazy in Love Yet Dread Losing It?

(0) Comments | Posted January 8, 2015 | 8:33 PM

Many people fear relationship failure. Real love makes us feel vulnerable and we tend to have fear of the unknown. Putting trust in someone can make us feel exposed. Some people even believe that the more they care about someone, the more at risk they are for being hurt.


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6 Signs Your Partner Is Good Marriage Material

(3) Comments | Posted December 1, 2014 | 4:46 PM

Who we choose to marry is one of the most important and costliest decisions a person will make, yet it's not uncommon for lovers to make errors in judgment. Why does this happen? One reason is that most of us aren't raised with a healthy template of marriage to follow....

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4 Ways Creating Shared Meaning Can Improve Your Marriage

(0) Comments | Posted November 13, 2014 | 11:20 AM

Over the past several years, I've written several articles about how to improve your marriage and prevent divorce. However, it struck me recently that all of these articles were missing an essential element of a lasting marriage -- the ability to create shared meaning, a purpose, or a dream with...

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